slow motion pain wreck

I went in yesterday for my second Selective Nerve Block. The doctor uses a steroid called Kenalog and under floroscopy inserts a needle into my spine directed at the sciatic nerve. It gives me about three weeks or so of pain relief. Not complete pain relief but enough so that I can stand and walk and carry on a conversation without screaming. I can’t stand long. Maybe thirty minutes at a time. I can’t sit for more than thirty. I don’t feel comfortable in any position other than the fetal position.
I’ve been interviewing physical therapists. I think I found one I like. He’s in Encino — which is fine. It’s better than driving to the West side. West Los Angeles might as well be Mars. The traffic is so horrible over there any thereputic benefit would be erased sitting in stop and go 16 mile per hour traffic. And yes, traffic on LA’s streets averages sixteen miles per hour.  That’s why I used to bike. Good job — biking helped me blow out my back.
I’m trying to maintain a positive attitude. That’s key here. I feel sorry for myself most of the time. I have a lot of regret, like having the surgery in the first place. But here I am. My therapist sent me a CD sampler of meditations. She knows I’m a sucker for that sort of thing.
There are a lot of people in my life helping me out. It’s this web, this interconnected web that keeps me alive. Quite literally. I stay alive because I am connected to humanity. I think if I didn’t have these people in my life I would have been dead several times over. My friends check in on my every day. My family checks in. My Ex’s parents check in. My students check in. My associates and colleagues check in. I have offers of help and support from everyone.
I’m writing this down here because I need to make sense of it. It’s the Longevity Invocation by Maoshing Ni. I don’t totally understand it so I’m hoping that by writing it down it will make sense.

Heaven is light
Earth is peaceful
I am calm

In perfect harmony heaven, earth and my being are one
All three realms share the same original source and follow the same universal law
When all things return to their orderly balance the creative and receptive expressions find harmony
When harmony is achieved water and fire energies flow unimpeded, returning to the root of revitalization

My emotions and desires are balanced and my spirit maintains mastery over all vital processes
I refine the nectar of my being into the highest energy connecting with all realities of the Universe
All negative energies are expelled from my life and my whole body is in a state of perfect balance

I give thanks to the divine masters for passing down instructions for achieving health and longevity through the laboratory of my physical essence, energy and spirit
I am dedicated to living the path of constructive life and practice constant renewal
To practice constant renewal is to extend my life’s duration
I am one with the subtle essence of the Universe and so enjoy the fruits of everlasting life.
I get lost trying to understand what "creative and receptive expressions find harmony" means. Any thoughts? Also, I don’t know what "water and fire" energies are — so, there’s that.