gah

My back hurts but my leg is really starting to hurt. It’s just like last time I reherniated. My leg is starting to feel like it’s on fire. I’m trying not to get ahead of myself but I’m freaking out. 

surgery
five month leave of absence
the works.

I was halfway home and then something as dumb as walking the dog. Two more months and I’d have been in the clear. 

I’m just so tired of being in pain all the time. Why can’t I just catch a break with this thing?

My classes start on Thursday. I have no idea how I’m going to do it. I have no idea how I can crawl through to the end of the semester like this. 
I have another friend coming to sleep in the couch tomorrow. One friend, out of work, no place to live sleeping in my office. Another friend out of work, no place to live sleeping on my couch. What is this, fucking 1939? I’m putting my hobos to work walking the effing dog, that’s for sure. Even though I have to cajole, remind, pester and insist to get it to happen. 
Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be.
Is that all there is? Is that all there is? If that’s all there is then let’s go dancing. 
No, I’m not on anything. Vicodin makes me constipated, depressed and it hurts my prostate. TMI? Well, there you go. I’m just on raw nerves.
I wasn’t going to post this picture. It’s from two months ago. But I feel like sympathy.