Florida never stops delivering the terrible

I grew up in Florida. 1979 to 1994. My mom still lives there. It’s the worst place on earth. Like ten times worse than Iraq, Syria, Liberia or even Somalia — combined. I am 100% sure that Florida is the worst place on earth. You’re like, “but in Syria you can be gassed to death.” Well, in Florida, flying roaches will lay eggs in your ears while you’re sleeping. Also, IED’s may be a hazard in Iraq but in Florida a sink hole, McNugget related killing or Santeria voodoo enthusiast could kill you as suddenly and unexpectedly, too. Plus Governor Rick “child of the night” Scott has more confirmed kills than Ted Bundy — (who himself is another Florida fun friend.)

So it comes as no surprise to me at all in reading Rosenstein’s latest indictments how frequently “Florida” is mentioned. Florida based VR Systems, an electronic voting system provider, was hacked all to hell and back. So their shoddy machines are out there handing votes to whoever the Russians would prefer. Then there is the unnamed Florida Republican congressional candidate who reached out to the Russians for dirt on his or her opponent. I know we have some shitty, shitty states in this country. Mississippi — first in being last. Alabama — always on the wrong side of history. North Carolina — now with 90% less democracy. But Florida takes the cake. The best thing about Florida is that in 100 years it will be underwater. (My favorite part of “Inconvenient Truth” was watching animation of Florida disappear from the map.)

As if handing the 2000 election to W wasn’t enough, now they’ve handed the country over to the Russians. That’s a stretch but it sounds right.

In 1980 I was at Arvida Junior High. Four cops killed Arthur McDuffie, a black Marine and then tampered with the evidence to cover it up. Weirdly, the city’s black residents were not too happy when the white cops were acquitted and so the Miami riots or rebellion broke out. At my Junior High we had bussing, so the riot was bussed to our school. I got punched in the face.  I don’t hold a grudge against the kid who punched me. He was poor, he was angry, there was no justice and here I was — this goofy white kid in parachute pants who had his whole privileged life ahead of him. Whatever happened to him — I don’t know. But he was from Liberty City, where the median income is $31K and the life expectancy is 66. I didn’t like being punched in the face at all and don’t suggest two wrongs make a right. However, as an adult, I do get why he punched me. This is what happens when injustice goes on and on without end. This is what happens when some lives matter more than others.

Now we have a Russian operative in the White House. He’s going to stoke divisions and stir up hatred and violence and some innocent people are going to get hurt — which in turn will stir further hatred and violence. Anyone who voted for him needs to stop deceiving themselves. He’s not your white knight — he is here to tear this country apart for fun and profit. His fun, his profit. Everyone else will pay.