When it’s good…its real good but when it’s bad…kill me
Our relationship is so unpredictable. When it’s good…its real good but when it’s bad…its UGLY! Rock’n with my man for 8 years has taught me a lot. He’s from Oakland, Cali and I’m from a city about 20 mins away called Hayward, Cali. Only a 20 minute difference but we are from 2 totally different worlds. My parents stayed married for 36 years n the only reason their not together now is because my momma died. Trust me…if she was still alive…they would still be together. My parents were *LIFER’S*…WHEN THEY SAID “I DO”…THEY DID N THEY MEANT IT FOR LIFE. My bf’s mom n dad were together but his father was also in another relationship with his step mother n both women knew about the other n they just lived like that.
So my BF n I met off a chat site n we both were looking for 1 thing n 1 thing only…To Fuck. Yah…i said it. I was just coming out of a 5 1/2 year relationship with my ex. (Dude before Darnell) See my ex (Dude before Darnell) n I hardly ever had sex n the 5 1/2 years we were together because he had sexual issues. So once i was single…thats what I was looking for..I only wanted sex. So Darnell n I met…we hit it off…we had great sex…n we kept it like that for a couple months. Then one day he asked me to come with him to one of his family bbq’s…i accepted n that’s the day I met his kids n his family…n I clicked with his family n his kids. That’s the day I fell hard for this man. I dove both feet…legs…arms…n heart into him. I’m a sucker for a family man…im a huge sucker for a good daddy…i love family n kids. I’m all about family. I think that’s the day he knew I wasn’t going anywhere. He seen how his family n his kids clicked with me…n that’s when he knew he couldn’t let go.
See…i jumped into this with blinders on. I mean I was completely blind sided. I think he was too. This began our crazy….painful….love story. My bf is 43 years old…but looks like he’s n his mid 20’s…he’s charming…fun…has a huge heart…loves his kids…crazy gorgeous (that’s the problem)…n his sex game is off the chain (that’s the OTHER problem).
HIS father was his example of how a man acts n even tho his Daddy was also a good hard working family man…he was a hoe…he loved WOMEN n this is exactly how my bf is. Now I’ve left him 3 times n almost 8 years BUT…i always come back *SHAKES MY OWN DAMN HEAD* N HE always wants me back. Im a pistol…a firecracker…i have a mouth n I exercise my right to speak n be heard. I just came back into this after a 10 month separation (longest I’ve ever stayed away). Darnell asked me to come back home. We both agreed that I can leave with no problems if he started doing the same shit. But…i came back this time with a different mind set. See….while he n I were separated…i found clarity n peace. I spent time with God n worked on me. But I never stopped loving Darnell….i was still always there for him n he’s always been there for me. That’s one thing bout this man…hes been the only one to stick it out n life with me. We have been each other’s rock of gilbrature. I’ve never felt so hated n so loved by someone n my life. To most ppl….we r a crazy concept but it seems to have kept us tight.
To be continued….