Thoughts

I weighed myself this morning and instead of seeing the 103/105 that I have been seeing, I saw 99…and the relief of seeing double digits far outweighs the satisfaction of trying to be healthy.
Half of me thinks this is okay because 99 is not significantly less than 103.
But I know that the sentiment behind “being okay” at 99, is that it is less than 100 and it’s easier for me to deal with. But being okay at 99 turns into being okay at 95, because 99 is just barely less than 100. And being okay at 95 turns into being ok at 90 because 90 isn’t significantly less than 95. And being okay at 90 turns into being okay in the 80s…etc
So. I just need to stop.

I made a pro and con list for being healthy vs not eating; I was sure that it would clear things up and remind me why I wanted and needed to choose to be healthy. But the only “pro” I had to being healthy, was that I would be healthy. And circular reasoning never proves shit.