03/07/2010

I stopped believing in love when he broke up with me.
Or, I guess, more specifically I stopped believing that I could be loved.
I could never stop believing in love because it’s something that is so important to me.
But believing that I could be loved is something I’ve always struggled with.
I remember an entry I wrote back in high school about how, even if I found someone who loved me, that I would just push them away until it was too hard for them to love me. Because back then that’s what I did. Push people away. Because it was easier that way.
But I grew up. And learned to embrace humanity and heartache. I let myself be vulnerable, even though it meant getting hurt sometimes.
But I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve been let down so many times that it just doesn’t seem worth it anymore.
Believing that I could be loved.