Saturday 8/20/22

5:10am I had a fairly decent night. Aide put me to bed at eleven.i had a lot of pain in my left foot. Nurse said it was caused by dead skin falling off. Aides put some lotion on ii but it didn’t help. The aides told me to sleep on my other side. I slept on my back but my foot was still painful. I didn’t have too much pain from arthritis that was a plus. In fact I think slept soundly with no nightmares. Aides got me out of bed and in my wheelchair by five.

I feel ok I guess. About all I can say is I’m above the dirt. I wish I could have coffee but will have to wait. Heck, I wish fot a lot of thing mainly to be free of pain and living in my old apartment.i wish I was free of debt and free from the rent screw up. Most of all I wish I was with Chocolatechip. Other than that I’m ok. I’m above the dirt.

Sorry for the rampage. Last thing I want is to start the day off complaining. It wrecks up your entire day.Still, I feel lost and overwhelmed all of a sudden. Woke up ok but I started dwelling on my problem and I feel so depressed now. How quick my mood changes once I start thinking  negative thoughts I just got to snap out of it and suck it up.

Damn I sure could use some coffee. It is 5:46 already. They will not be serving drinks for another hour. I feel like hell without my morning dose of caffeine. I wish I could fall back to sleep until seven. But I’m wide awake.  I won’t feel all that great until I get my coffee. The wait is just plain torture.

7:54am I got my caffeine fix! I had two cups of hot coffee a d a glass of oj. Breakfast was good. I had a muffin, scrambled eggs and oatmeal. I must of been hungry because I ate it all. Thanks to coffee and breakfast I have an entirely different outlook on life. Things do not seem so bad.

I talked with Chocolatechip. She want feeling well. So he is afraid she might of cought something when her kitchen sink was backing up. Chocolatechip also said she had a dream about another tenant . She didn’t elaborate. Then she was talking about how she can’t help out this other tenant anymore. I said good you are not running a charity case. She didn’t name any names but I assume she was referring to Eddie.

I started to bitch about my problems. I didn’t want to bring it up but it just came out. I was going on about how I was in debt up to my eyeballs. I said I wish to hell I got started on credit cards and I will never get out of debt. Chocolatechip said she was in the same boat a few years ago. They can easily spiral out of control. I said I’m going to pay off my debt. It might take awhile but I’ll pay it off.

I said I’m not buying any books. Then I said Stephen King is coming out with a new book September 6 I told her I will figure out a way to get that one because he is mt favorite author. The new bookI is $16.49. Plus I would like to keep the New York Times  which is $19.99 Chocolatechip said how much will I have left? I said nothing. Then she said maybe I can get you an Amazon gift card. I said you don’t have to do that

We ended our conversation because Chocolatechip had to get busy. I feel fairly good right now. I’m trying hard not to think about finances. I’m trying hard not to beat myself up over this situation. That will not help matters one bit. But I can’t help but feel I’m a complete screw up who can’t manage his money. Maybe it is time for me to get a payee I don’t know I don’t know about anything

9:15am I have been reviewing my Amazon account. it seemed I had two subscriptions to the New York Times. I cancelled the one I signed up for yesterday. The older bill is not due until September 4. It is for 19.99. I also deleted my Kindle Unlimited account for $9.99 and my Audible account for $15.99. I wasn’t getting much out of those services I deleted.  I hope to save $43 something Nowi can get that new Stephen King book for sure along with the audible narration.

I really don’t need another book. There is no law that says I have to get that Stephen King book when it comes out. So it’s not a done deal that I should get it. Still it is good I cancelled those subscriptions I wasn’t using.  Remember, the top priority is to pay the rent then pay down my credit cards. This is my goal and I have more than enough books..

I just got today’s menu. For lunch they are serving sausage, pepper and onion, Italian Broccoli, pan fried potatoes, dinner roll and a strawberry stripe cake. For dinner I’m having turkey club sandwich, Mediterranean vegetable soup, pasta salad and Mandarin oranges. These are two meals I’m not too crazy abou but I’ll eat them anyways. It is better than going hungry.

I talked with Chocolatechip. She got her housework finished. Then she is taking a shower. I was telling her about cancelling the Amazon subscriptions. She subscribed es to You Tube Prime. music is my therapy she said. I feel the same way about the New York Times. I said still I might be able to save $40 if I’m doing it right. She said maybe I can get that book after all. I said it is not a priority.

I feel a lot better after cancelling those subscriptions. At least I’m taking some positive action instead of sitting in my wheelchair and crying

1:34pm Lunch turned out to be pretty good. I ate it all. I called Chocolatechip after I ate. She is doing good today . Sho got a lot accomplished and felt proud of herself. I said her apartment could probably pass inspection. She said it could thanks to her work We then read each other’s journals . Then we started talking about budgets. She said everything is going up. The last time she shopped at WM she spent over a hundred dollars. It said it didn’t look like a lot once she got it in her freezer. I said I understand about food prices

I feel pretty good right now. My foot isn’t hurting too much. Arthritis pain is down to a two. I ‘m not depressed or worried about finances. I keep saying to myself I will get through this. I’m having a good day.

10:25pm. I did a lot of reading tonight. I read almost seventy pages. I started after talking with Chocolatechip. The material I went over was so interesting. I got lost in it.  Consequently, I feel very relaxed almost like I don’t have a care in the world. This turned out to be a very good day

I’ve been in my wheelchair since five,is over seventeen hrs. I am getting kind of tired.i hope they will put me to bed soon.