Monday 10/30/23

8:01 a.m. I had bad nightmares last night. I was dreaming about that stupid Stephen King book The Waste Lands. I was the leader of a small band of survivors in a world destroyed by nuclear war. We were traveling through unhabitable lands . Every step of the way we were attacked by demons and mutants . My dreams were almost right out of that book.

Also, I didn’t get very good care. I was lying in urine most of the night. The aides did let me sleep untill five. But they were not very friendly or gentle when getting me up. But I was hanged and dressed and in my wheelchair by 5:30 . I was glad when the process was over.

I talked with Chococolatechip. She cancelled the trip to the Urban Mission in Steubenville She said it was raining pretty bad. She didn’t want to get sick. I said you were looking forward to going. Shek said she had too much on her plate anyway. Then we talked about Frontier.

Chococolatechip was worried they were going to give her a hard time. I said people cancel orders all the time. I also looked at their web page. It said no contractual obligations. So you should be ok. She felt somewhat reassured. We talked until coffee and breakfast was served.

I had my oj and coffee. The coffee finally got me going. I had a good breakfast. I had two pieces of French toast. It was delicious. Thanks to drinks and coffee I feel like I’m amongst the living. But I can’t wait for another cup at the coffee social.

I should be getting that gift card on November 1. Chococolatechip tracked it for me this morning. I have been worried about that as well. I hope the Amazon gift card doesn’t get “lost” in the mail. Everything seems to be going wrong and I’m afraid something will go wrong with this.. I keep thinking somebody in the nursing home will steal it.

Damn I just got my menu. Main course is the infamous ham and pinto beans and. Yech! Fortunately they are having a good substitute. I can tolerate a good sloppy joe sandwich. For dinner I’m having fish, broccoli,hash brown casserole a dinner roll and homemade Dutch apple pie. This sounds good.

9:45a.m. I’m at the Coffee Social obsessing over that damned Amazon gift Card. Now Chococolatechip was saying the package is in Follansbee and it should be delivered today. But I’m jumping out of my wheelchair in anticipation. I won’t be able to rest until that card is in my hot little hands and the books are in my library..

I cannot help but think something will go wrong. I will not get the damned card because it will be stolen. Then if I do get it I won’t be e able to redeem the damned thing. Chococolatechip will have another upset because she would have spent $25 for the card plus $9 to send it by certified mail.

I’m a constant worrier. I worry about every frigging little thing. I am also a firm believer in Murphy’s Law- Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. If last month is any indication that something will go wrong with this then it most certainly will. I’m at the point now where I’m willing to bet the farm that there will be a big school rew up over this frigging card.

Worrying will not do any good or change anything. What will be will be. I’m just making myself sick I keep telling myself this. I tell myself this all the time. Perhaps one day it will sink into my stupid head.

11:38a.m. Despite worrying about the Amazon gift card I had a good time at the Coffee Social. I had! two coffees then finished my writing. I stayed down there for an hour then made. my way back to my room. I called Chocolatschip. We talked about different things for about an hour. She eased my minds bit. Talking with her always makes me feel better.

2:12p.m. I had two very good sloppy joes for lunch. Surprisingly, I didn’t get bloated. I then called the front desk. They told me mail is usually delivered between three and four So I will be expecting a package around that time. Then I started to hurt down below. I was very uncomfortable but had to wait at least an hour after lunch. An aide finally came in to put me in bed and change my briefs. I feel better now.

I’ve been trying to read my book The Waste Lands by Stephen King. But thanks to obsessing over that gift card I can’t concentrate. I will know soon enough if I’m going to get it today or not. Perhaps if I will know one way or another then my mind will settle. Then I can lay back and enjoy the books I have. I have at least ninety minutes to go.

I feel fairly calm right now. I’m just laying in bed and chilling out. I really worked myself up over a $25 Amazon gift card. It’s just I got so excited over this? Nobody but Chococolatechip thinks of me and getting that gift card was a big deal. I just wanted everything to go right. But worrying and making myself upset will not make it right. Like Chococolatechip says, what will be will be.

Well, I might as well go read my book now. I’ll call the front desk again at 3:30.

4:25p.m. I got my $25 Amazon gift card! I was able to redeem it! Then I bought two John Grisham novels, The Firm and The Exchange: After the Firm I called Chocolatschip and thanked her. I said that card made my day! I also said Iam so lucky to have you in my life! Chococolatechip sure is a blessing in my old age.

Now I’m torn between two loves. Part of me wants to continue with the Dark Tower series. Even though I read these books a long time ago this is like rereading them for the first time. Stephen !ing had me sucked into his Mid- World and Roland’s epic quest for the Dark Tower. Im finishing up the third book. I just can’t stop on the middle of the journey.

Then there is John Grisham. Grisham is another favorite author. I am anxious to get started on his latest book. I love Grisham as much as King. These are certainly on my reading list. I’ll probably get to these books in December. Oh I’m one happy old man!

9:02p.m. I didn’t eat much of a supper. I ate the fish and the Dutch Apple pie. I was afraid of getting sick. I had a big breakfast and lunch. That was enough for me.

I talked with Chocolatechip after I ate. She was telling me the latest about Comcast. Her bill went up$15. The last money order she sent still hasn’t been cashed. She said she was thinking of telling Comcast to fuck themselves. I said before you to that call Legal Aide. I also said I don’t understand any of this. After all I advised her to call Frontier and that turned into a big mistake.

Then she talked about the bed bug situation. Chocolatechip said again het airbed is polluted with bb. After all the spraying. after all the stuff she threw out, she still has bed bugs. The Housing Authority does not no what else to do. Even the exterminator doesn’t have an answer. Chocolatechip said nobody can solve her problems.

For a minute she really sounded desperate. Chocolatechip said she confessed to having some “thoughts” this morning. This kind of scared me. I said please don’t do anything stupid, I could not go on without you.

I also got her thinking of some positive thoughts. Despite the bb she has a nice warm apartment. She has health insurance and a social security check. Better still she has three beautiful daughters who are doing well. Then I said you have me who will always love you. We talked about other positive thoughts and both out moods improved. I hope she will be ok tonight.

We talked for about a half hour then she went to bed at the usual time. This was around 6:30 I read my book The Waste Lands I read until 8 . I’m almost finished with that book. I decided to continue on the road to the Dark Tower.

Ttp