i am at ease.

http://youtu.be/LUmnpYwfsTk
(I would embed but for some reason my mac doesn’t let me)

this song, in fact the whole CD is in my car, but this song just kind of feels like ‘me’ right now. just the tune… maybe not so much all the words, but mostly the ‘i am at ease’.

so the permission from the hopefully-future parents-in-law went better than well. right away, they told me, "we like you," and the father told me he’s been praying for me since i was born. by the end of the discussion they said, "yes, yes, definitely yes." so that was affirming.

now i need the ring, and decide on my way of approach. i’ll let you know more as the time draws closer.

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maybe it’s because i’m a youth pastor, but i’ve always been one of those geeks who likes ghost story shows. yesterday i started the 2005 version of amityville horror, it being a long time since i watched it, i forgot a few parts. one part being a rather raunchy sex scene. needless to say i stopped it there.

one way that’s been healing me from this sexual sin is just the plain fact of admission. before i’d say to myself ‘i’m a youth pastor, i shouldn’t be dealing with this.’ now whenever i’m tempted i own up and say to God, "Father, I"m a sexual addict, I need You to get me through this."

i did the same thing last night, and then to get my mind off it i watched the first season premiere of star trek deep space nine. lol. never seen it. i’m a trekkie, so i thought i would lol.

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today it was so FALLISH. i love it! autumn’s my favorite season! it’s HERE. i hope it’s overcast and chilly tomorrow. i’m odd. i’m one of those guys who’s one big fricken ray of sunshine on rainy days, and i’m more tended to be depressed on bright sunny days. lol. i’m backwards.