End of Day 1

I think I did pretty well today.  I had a cup of cottage cheese and a bottle of water around 11a.m.  Then I had a cup of cottage cheese with cucumbers and a cup of coffee around 4.  After my meeting around 7 I had about a cup of ziti with plain marinara sauce.  Total calories for the day:  564.  I’m pretty happy with that.  I was estimating around 1,000 and I did just about half.  I’m going to drink another bottle of water before bed.  I swear, from the coffee and water, I was peeing every five seconds today.

So I went over to cut Alex’s hair.  Let’s just say it didn’t come out as I had expected.  It was a little messy, but he was rushing me.  He told me to use the shortest comb on the clippers, which I told him I thought was too short, but that was what he wanted.  He always wears a hat anyway, but I know he wasn’t happy even though he insisted that it was okay.

I was reading my old entries and it made me feel pretty upset to read that he used to be sweet to me.  Asking me to spend the night, telling me he saw us together in the future, and that he missed me.  All of them were lies.  I’ve tried letting go of all hope, but it still hurts me.  It kills me when he’s drunk and he tries things.  The other night he came over at like 3:30a.m. wasted and spent the night with me.  We didn’t do anything, although he tried.  We woke up at like noon and just laid together.  It was nice.  We took a shower and hung out for a little while, but he had a meeting around 3.

I want one of those mornings everyday.  I would love to wake up with him and spend the day together.  I’m staying with him over winter break because I can’t stay on campus.  I’m looking forward to it, but I’m not going to be too happy to go back to campus in January.

Well, this entry went from my eating today to my relation-shit.  Oh well.  This shitty mood is really helping my dieting.  I haven’t been tempted to eat anything fattening yet.  Tomorrow I’m switching from cottage cheese to yogurt.  I haven’t decided what kind of food I’m going to eat for dinner.  It seems hard at night to just eat yogurt or cottage cheese.  I was thinking a sandwich, but that has a lot of calories.  Any suggestions for really low calorie foods?  I guess cereal would be good.  Or maybe soup, but they don’t always serve kinds that I like in the Union.  Hm, I’ll have to brainstorm what I can eat tomorrow.