It’s not even my birthday!

 It’s not even my birthday! 🙂 

 
Ok so my bday was on the 24th, I had an amazing time!!!
 
I went to this fancy Italian restaurant with a new friend of mine who has the same bday and she suggested we get birthday tiaras jokingly but I held her to it and bought some for us to wear! If I can get some pics of us wearing them I will! 
We went to another bar afterwards and I had so much fun! Here’s the thing nothing happened really, I didn’t meet any cute or amazing guys or nothing spectacular happened but I just felt pure joy, pure extacy I almost wondered if someone slipped me a Molly or something but I don’t think so it was just amazing! I hardly drank anything and I was having this euphoric rush. I was happy energenic at peace and in celebration mode! 
 
I wasn’t sure how I was going to be on my bday considering the fact that this is my first birthday away from my evil family, my mother father and sister. 
 
I swear when I put that tiara on I felt like a princess! I felt special and I felt like Nikki Minaj in moment for life. When you wait for something for so long, a good birthday to feel completely happy and at peace and you meet great friends and people and you aren’t thinking you are just dancing and being. Laughing and joking. 
 
I thought I would get nostalgic but I just felt in the present and in the moment. 
 
So my birthday was beautiful. 
Went home slept peacefully… 
 
The next few days I saw an old friend of mine we went to Thai restaurant, Starbucks and than a pub to drink some beers. It was eh. She paid for everything but she wouldn’t stop talking about herself and her relationships and I didn’t want to play therapist for too long I kept changing the subject and bringing back to childhood memories and things we could both talk about but she hardly got the hint! She was texting away every second to her parents and to some guy pretty much the whole time. I told her that the university I am going to is one of the best in the world so. I am proud to go there and she starts debating to me about it. Saying that ppl from Toronto are arrogant and she lies about saying she’s not from Toronto because people think we are arrogant people. But both of us aren’t even from Toronto anyways and the university is one of the best. But even so she wants to battle wits to win I guess to make her ego and herself feel more superior or smarter. Even if I was wrong why do u wanna start arguing about it. Does it matter that much?  I am just happy to go to school and am excited cant you be happy for me instead of trying to argue about technicalities, she’s always bragging about this and that all the time and I just ignore it. 
 
So we had a bit of a banter when she was talking about her "guy" this guy we both knew growing up. She asked me if I would sleep with him and I said no he seems to be too self absorbed and immediately she gets all defensive and is like no not at all he is the most selfless lover ever, that I ever had. Lol so I am like ok than….sure…
 
She’s just one of those people who are very passive aggressive and makes snide comments but can dish it but can’t take it. Like she had plans after and she kept gushing on about how epic it’s going to be and how much fun she is going to have…we were just talking about how we both had nothing planned for the week and she goes oh well I am sure you don’t want to come with us I am sure you have things to do…and I go well are you asking me or what, because I am not begging to come…lol 
 
Like just be straight the fuck up with me. I really didn’t wanna go anyways really. Not when someone obviously kind of makes it kind of obvious it was a last minute invitation. 
 
Anyways it was her blathering on all night bragging and ranting and raving about her issues when it came to me saying how I felt she could hardly muster up anything suportive or good to say. There was good times here and there but she’s just one of those jealous insecure friends I guess.
 
Anyways the next day she sends me this long text about how
Much she loves my new place and area and how she wishes she could move in w me and how much of a great time she had……so I dunno people are weird. She’s a big people pleaser type personality so I dunno I guess she was sucking up a bit. 
 
But hey I guess you just limit contact with ppl like that. I strive for more equality in my relationships I don’t want anyone to take care of me and I don’t really want to take care of anyone else. I mean help people out supprt them and if someone is in a more tough spot I can see how the roles get reversed for awhile but really resentment just breeds either way when one person is so needy all the time and the other feels they have to listen and supprt and do this and that. 
 
Anyways. I found out my heritage is gypsy. Both my parents are gypsy. I confronted my mom about this but she denied she was and said that only my dad was but I think it’s just because she’s ashamed of her heritage. Gypsy has a bad name, as thieves, nomads, cheap, poor, all these other names so. I do get why but it does explain my fashion choices and my dancing and the other language that I speak which is Roma. I can speak it but I don’t know what. Am saying and Sometimes the accent comes on out of nowhere and I don’t know why, I just chalked it up to playing around joking around but I speak Roma I think it is fluently mostly in my sleep and when I am under stress. I bought a translator and realized I was saying some pretty crazy things in Russian which is the closest language to Roma I guess. I am still not sure of the exact dialect I am speaking. My mom and my whole family are still either lying or in denial of everything. 
<div style="font-family: Noteworthy; font-size: 18px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 24px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0976563); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(191, 107, 82, 0.496094); “> 
So yeah pretty interesting anyways. I never thought I. Was purely Italian or Finnish so it’s good to Know that both these countries have the same sub culture which is gypsy and is why my parents got together because they are both gypsy too, I always thought finnish and Italian were a very diverse mix. Kind of strange. 
 
So yeah. I am a gypsy and my birthday lands on a santanic holiday that they celebrate and that why also my birthday was made into a big deal because it is similar to Halloween it’s the day of the underworld. So they treated me like the damn "choosen" one. That went over very well with my brother and sister no wonder they hated me and abused me. But the thing is I didn’t always like the attention all the time it made me uncomfortable, naturally I am not always that loud flamboyant person. I like my privacy so a lot of the time it annoyed me or upset me because I felt like they were always watching me and scrutinizing me. Valuing me one minute and hating me the next 
 
So anyways I am sure this sounds kind of crazy I know it sounds crazy to even me but its what I have Learned my mom is a bad liar and she has admitted most of it so far. 
 
Crazy ass family I tell you…..