coping with the assault alone
how do you cope with the aftermath of being assaulted alone? i have a therapist but i only see her once every two weeks for fourty minutes which doesnt seem like enough to me and shes booked up already for two weeks.
I am having trouble coping with the aftermath of the physical assault that I have endured. I feel very alone. I have told my mom and she has been great but its just really hard because she doesnt understand what happened and I guess I wish I could make her understand. Today when she got home from work she was being all nice and friendly and said hi to me and i was really kind of brash and down about my reply and she asks me whats wrong. It just made me angry because she knows that I just went through she knows all the details and she expects me to be upbeat and just forget about it. I just told her not to take it personally because she got mad at me that I wasnt all happy go lucky or something I dont know.
The people I have told dont seen to care or understand and I hate myself for feeling so upset about it all especially since I dont feel I have much consistant support and validation. i feel like an idiot. I just know I cant expect anyone to really care and be with with me really. i mean i am kind of scared because he threatened to kill me and knows where i live and told me to watch my back but i mean my moms not here she took off to her bfs and i dont trust the cops to care and none of my friends that i do have care i wanted to see a friend tonight and maybe stay at his house tonight but he said he was busy doing something with his car. its like i am nothing to these people. i almost wished i died than.. i feel like if this guy was to want to kill me he could because no one cares enough to protect me or take me seriously really. its nothing to them and everything to me. i just feel very alone and dont trust anyone. i dont know if there are any good people out there. i mean people will be there for you for like a tiny bit than they disapear and i feel you cannot trust them to stick around espectially when things are tough. all i have gotten from the friends ive told is indifference and blaming and almost i feel fake concern or little concern. i dont know i guess this is normal.
how do you cope with post traumatic stress on your own? because that is what i am seeming to try to do right now…….