Recent Entries

• 2013

  December 30, 2013

  Day will be breaking soon, and the sharp chill in the air places excitement in my lungs. New Years Eve. I've been waiting all year for this. To be in this beautiful place, made of both shadow and light. To be able to fully embrace all that the world has to offer me. 2013 was…

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• Attention

  December 26, 2013

  Paying attention. It's one of the things I've managed to do more of this year. I really think it's an integral part of becoming a better person and living a happier life.  Because it's so regrettably easy to pay attention to very little. It's easy to zone out in front of the computer or TV.&...

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• Torrential Rainpour

  November 26, 2013

  I am full of coffee and good intentions, after my sleepy melancholy this morning. I've been having weird, crazy, and sometimes slightly insane dreams -- it's the Chantix -- and the one last night knocked me on my knees. Brandon was there, apologetic. And this isn't isolated... lately I've dreamed...

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• unequivocal

  November 18, 2013

  I chanced to look toward the sky on Sunday night; the world had taken on an icy cast because of the steadily dropping temperature. The moon was nearly full and quite breathtaking in its ethereal beauty, and sheer clouds moved with surprising speed past it. The result was like a piece of soft, wel...

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• pinprick

  November 11, 2013

  Coffee is a stealth-soother and I like it that way. It's hot and relaxing and settles over all the organs like a warm, fuzzy blanket, but really it's a tonic for fatigue, my ever-constant companion. You know, I think I'm just confused: my limbs are incredibly tired and I'm unused to it. All this ...

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• words

  November 9, 2013

   i don't write enough. it's november and the chill is enough to numb my fingers, my mind, maybe my whole body. wracked with shivers, this all-consuming cold. but my heart is strong and warm and there is always a beacon of hope. a tiny spark. even when i speak broken, disjointed words, that c...

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• babychanges

  October 27, 2013

  I promise from this moment forward to take a step. A baby step, if that's all I can do. I watched documentaries all afternoon and perhaps that is why I'm feeling all spiritually-invested, bubbling over with energy and excitement and a "can-do" attitude. I get this every couple of weeks ...

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• Treaded

  October 26, 2013

   The job hunt continues. Perhaps I am being a bit picky, but honestly, I am tired of "settling" for jobs because they PROMISE to pay more, get me more hours, etc, all that never materializes, or, if it does, it's in a way that makes me want to slit my wrists. (e.g. "hey let's ...

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• Diet Changes

  October 17, 2013

   I've been changing my diet. Not because I think I'm fat or anything like that (though, due to skipping the gym for months on end, I've lost most of my muscle tone and gained a little fat on my legs and stomach). Instead, it's because I eat like absolute crap, and when I eat like…

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