Recent Entries

• Lost… As per usual

  June 22, 2024

  I don't understand it. I don't get why I can't move on from something that is hurting me. Why I would rather wallow and suffer in it. It feels good mourning. It feels so good missing. God, why do I need this feeling so much that it encroaches into my life and encourage it? I…

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• Bewilderment

  April 12, 2024

  Why does it feel like I am barely waking up all the time? I know what I need to do, but it is so difficult to change. Changing my habits and my environment comes with an overwhelming resistance. I don't think that for me it is due to fear. It's due to my laziness. I…

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• Busy, yet lazy, week

  January 21, 2024

  So much has happened this week. I got called out of nowhere to help a friend take care of their dog. Tilly is very sweet but she is huge. She seems like a great dane/dalmation mix. Smokey loves having a sister around. She does get very aggressive with her food. I had to tackle her…

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• Distractions

  January 3, 2024

  I'm studying for the promotion board. But everyone likes to come in and distract me. They come in and want me to engage. Normally I wouldn't mind, but right now it's like, "Come on now. You see me reading somethin'. Get out of my face." In the office today not much was going on. Fixed…

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• Jammed-Packed Day

  December 26, 2023

  Today was a pretty good day. Started with a nice walk with Smokes. He stopped pulling since I taught him how to heel. We went through a little bit of a wooded trail that he really enjoyed. Met up with Asher and his human afterwards. Smokey is too funny with other dogs. I went over…

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• Merry Christmas, fellow diarists.

  December 25, 2023

  I ended up being sick for Christmas, but it was manageable. I set up a playdate for Smokey with a dog named Asher and his human. Smokey is so submissive! I was like, "HEY. DON'T BEND THE KNEE!". He knelt to every dog. And then he does the weird stuff of trying to lick other…

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• First ACP Duty

  December 22, 2023

  I did my first ACP duty. Basically it just means I scan people's ID's to make sure they are okay to get on base. It was cold at a nice 35 degrees. I enjoyed it. It's always nice to see so many people smiling. My brain is wired to smile at anyone who smiles at…

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• Godzilla Minus One!!!

  December 17, 2023

  Godzilla Minus One. This is now my favorite movie. I love the story, the acting, graphics, everything! This movie was amazing. Right now that I am in the military, it truly motivated me to be ready for anything. I will be learning Japanese because I want to be able to watch it in its native…

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• Domestic Violence

  December 10, 2023

  What would you do if you happen upon screaming and hatred being spewed from your neighbors? I walked out of a friend's house just now and I heard hate coming from the first floor. It didn't sound like there was anything physical. But I am also not in that room. I hope they are both…

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