I'm now a two time widow.
Married at 20 to a man who was 18 yrs older... He gave me the gift no one else could. My son.

You'll see those chapters early on.

Then I met my soul mate... In 2013. I thought he was my forever....

He passed in 2015.

I've learned to over come so much since I started this. 💙 Ill be back to fully update this... I promise... But for now... I'm in shock....

Latest Entry

Not even sure who reads this anymore….

February 11, 2020
So... I'm not even sure if anyone still reads me. I guess I'm just documenting for myself right now. Sunday night I had another CVA. A small one... Lasted under 5 minutes.  If it had been over I'd had called 911.... But. Since it didn't... There was no point.  It terrified the boyfriend and I&hel...
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Recent Entries

  • Goodbye, OD
    August 9, 2013
    For many years now, I've had many friends I could count on. In retrospect, I didn't return the gift to them. And for that? I truly am sorry- and paying for it now.   I just wanted to drop a note to say goodbye to OD and the many I have met here on OD...…
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  • Favor… please?
    February 17, 2013
    Hey ladies.  Normally I wouldnt ask for some "pimping love" but if yall could share this for me, it would be fantastic. Im a single *disabled* mom whose unable to work right now... esp with Surgery coming up next week (eep!!) if yall would help and share me, I would greatly appreci...
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  • One Chance
    January 24, 2013
    Many of you I know the obvious answer to this question.    But Im weeding out friends/ bookmarks.    If you arent on my list now is the time to speak up. And if you want to stay (like I said, many of you I know the obvious answer to this anyways) you need to…
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  • Meant to Die, The Used
    November 12, 2012
    Past midnight, breathing in the dark. Same strange friend comes to visit Never intend to open the door. You take it to places that no one's ever been You let it, you let it. Your insides caving in. You pushed and pulled, still wanting some more. This time I've gone all the way without you.…
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  • Greif
    June 19, 2012
    1. I am not strong. I'm just numb. When you tell me I'm strong, I feel you don't see ...me.   2. I will not recover. This is not a cold or the flu. I'm not sick. I'm grieving and that's different. I will not always be grievi...ng as intensely, but I will never forget…
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  • 4/6/2012
    April 5, 2012
    In case you didnt hear.... was in ICU Monday till yesterday .... Im one tired woman. Its MS
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  • Do they celebrate birthdays in heaven?
    March 23, 2012
    Felix.... On Monday, you would have been 46.  Do you know how this just... eats at me? You were too young to go. You had too much life to live. You didnt get to see your son grow up... who is a spitting image of you...  You didnt get to see any of this. Not…
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  • First Public entry in I dont know how long…
    March 14, 2012
    Now... I want to point this out this morning, as it hit me over the head like a brick.    So.. we can gather up to stop Animal abuse (which, I agree with stopping the abuse)...    However. We turn a blind eye to child abuse?    "Oh, it doesnt effect me!" Yo...
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  • A sad day for me. Three years later….
    January 6, 2012
                Today is the day, Three very long yet short years ago... that we discovered your bodies and soul had separated.  May you both, rest in peace today, and always, you are on my mind... both of you.  (Husband) Felix Anthony Lucero, March 26, 19...
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