Recent Entries

• 90’s 90210

  March 7, 2019

  I grew up watching Beverley Hills 90210- I was only 8 in 1990.   But I lived in New Zealand so I think by the time it made it to NZ I must have been at least 11 of 12, I recall watching at least seasons 1-5 before I moved on to something else. Clearly, with…

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• 40

  January 18, 2019

  2am is near. I think about my best friend from high school - Jess I have written about her. I think of her almost every day.  26 so full of life so amazing.... I miss her so much... she said this to me a few times, but I actually remember the first time. We would of be…

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• Reality or Pleasure

  January 12, 2019

  [embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbFOEplKA60[/embed]   How do you go about changing your life? I have dreams about who I think I want to be. While half of me wants to be this new person, the other half of me thinks why?  Will it be worth it.. do you think that that it will better, or e...

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• I need to change

  January 5, 2019

  I want to try and be different this year, I want to change me. I worry about who I will be in the future, what will happen to me if I don't start to pull myself together. I have spent 10 years trapped, broken, and dreaming about a life that I want to have so badly…

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• Pity Party

  January 1, 2019

  I loathe this time of year. Xmas - New Year  It reminds me of another year has gone by where I have remained frozen During 2008 my life hit some major dark spots.  and I can't seem to move on. I got some help from a friend to get through this period over the last…

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• Hold on

  July 29, 2018

  Song: Hold on by Pearl Jam https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egoftWGlCAA I spend my life repeating myself. I know I do this. I know I am trapped. I guess some days I feel better than others.   I try internet dating/apps, I talk with a nice guy, we flirt but then this thing inside of me. I know its ...

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• Unloveable

  May 20, 2018

  Song: This is the Life -Wendy and Lida https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5L2qtGsKZo I once read that there was a study done on people who internet date.   It was done by tens of thousands of people, and they asked a question to everyone! Q: What worries you about internet dating the most? Women an...

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• Switch

  May 12, 2018

  Song: Charlie Puth - We don't talk anymore https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3AtDnEC4zak 10 years ago, I became this broken person I have been trying to not be this person, but its like I am stuck.  Ever my Diary pages a filled every year about things I want to do, be, have.. yet WHY why can't I . ...

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• BACK OD!! and so happy

  April 29, 2018

  Song Freedom! - Pitch Perfect   I am so glad to back here.  I missed this place.   Its been a while OD.  But while some things have changed so much is still the same. I look forward to sharing again! Welcome to my thoughts people! I like to to have music to them.. so you know…

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