A Fresh Start

I should probably try to get myself into writing blogs so that I could practice my writing skills. Cause if I don’t I might end up losing my touch after all.

Life at the office nowadays is always so toxic.

The people around us are 5-star a-holes. Not to mention the people who would always try to interact with us. They’re so plastic. They seem to think that we don’t know the kind of people they actually are.

All of us have gone through changes as time went on that we’d spend in that place.

We went through so many things that we’ve now somehow become like them in some way.

We’ve learned the art of lying – even through your teeth. Knowing how to pretend like we know nothing when all along we knew everything.

Before spending almost 4 years in that place, I’ve always thought of myself as a great pretender since I have always been able to fool those around me, and I somewhat commended myself for that. But apparently, that pretending stuff was the one that would save me at the end of the day.

I’ve learned that showing how others would get to your skin was the most embarrassing thing you could ever do. Plus, it was something that most people have and will learn to exploit. If you show them even an ounce of a weakness… they’ll pounce on it like hungry hyenas, just waiting for you to fall.

I have been trying to leave that place for quite some time, but I have never really gotten to doing it. But this time, if the opportunity would present itself to me, I’d love nothing more than to grab it by the horns and just go with it.

You only live once, they say. I don’t want to live my one life with people that would be happy to see me miserable.

I love my people, those that are in our tight-knit of friends and colleagues. We get each other and we’ve always got each other’s backs. They would be the hardest part for me to let go off. But as my boss said, “I love you guys, but it’s no longer healthy here.”

I’d rather we leave that place as soon as we can and be able to talk to each other like normal people, like friends, instead of staying there and slowly see our worlds crumble down.

I’ve learned a lot, good things and bad, and I’d forever be thankful for the opportunities that I was able to experience during my time with them, but that’s it.

I would never be thankful for them in making me question every single thing that other people would say or do. I would never be thankful for them making me realize that the world is mostly black instead of grey. I would never thank them for ruining what was a good family that I found in the office but would now have no other choice but to leave to save myself from further destruction.

It has been a long run.

And I just want to finish this leg of the relay race for now.

I’m ready for my next run.