A. Nony Mouse

February 27, 2013

Previous: For My Husband

Next: For Silence

For Denial, Revisited

I’m just so goddamn tired of it all, every single bit of it. No one ever wins, and I don’t want to play anymore.

So, here we go having the same old fight again

oh, there she goes

same old game that never ends

If I could say

all the right words

I know I could make you stay

If I could say

all the right words

things wold work out all right

And if you go

I won’t believe

that it’s forever

And you can go

But I’ll never leave

cause it’s not over, oh

Replay last night

Talking it out don’t make it right

I know she’s tried, my whole world

is her and all we’ve got now

And if you go

I won’t believe

that it’s forever

I won’t let go

Even if she says that it’s over

I know it’ll be different this time

if you’d just stay

And when we wrote this story

How did it end?

It was you and me for all our lives

Come on, don’t say it

We’ll try again

and if I’d just hold you

we could last

But she stands softly

tears down her face

Hitting me, oh god

This is the end

I’d wait here for you

But there’s nothing more now I can do

How did you know?

Finally.

JadedAngel68

February 28, 2013

Buttercup

March 4, 2013

So sorry. 🙁 And RYN: How can I tell he’s for real? Because he started changing even before I busted him being a moron. Weird things like he started kissing me. Before, he could seriously go years without kissing me ever. Like not even a peck on the cheek. All of a sudden he was affectionate. The weekend before last, he brought me breakfast/lunch in bed.

He started doing little things to be nice. It was weird, because it was like the guy I was dating 22 years ago was back from the dead. He wasn’t a completely different person – he was just the guy I hadn’t seen for more than 2 decades. I still don’t trust it all completely, because I have spent the last 15 years being kicked while I am down or when I am dumb enough to trust. But I have to admit

that things now are WAY different than all the other times he claimed he had changed.

ryns: lol, thank you! i’m glad you’re enjoying it all! i just added you to my faves list so you should be able to read everything i haven’t made completely private. i’ve been here since 2000 and made a lot of the early stuff private though. it’s all broken up into chapters though if that helps and thank you for putting a HUGE smile on my face today!

ryn: you really have to ask if i’m a whore? of course i’m a whore! i’m the whoriest whore who ever whored!

ryn: oh, I pride myself on it! if i had been an actor, i’d have wound up being the straight-man in comedies, delivering dry lines that are ridiculously funny. i may have missed my calling, actually.

ryn: lol, i had to go back and see which picture that was–I had to double-check to make sure that guy was me. 😉 As for the fish…yes, the same fish are still swimming around. I think from that day forward, only 1 of the fish has died off. The rest just keep breeding. There are probably 20-25 fish now from a stock of 10-12 to start with. The largest of them are about 10 inches longnow (but a lot of that is tail). They’re all hibernating now…well, sort of hibernating, they swim in place all winter long.

oh, and as for tattoos…i’ve wanted another one ever since i got the first. it took me forever to figure out what i wanted for the first one though and i haven’t even come close to figuring out what to get for a second one. but they are addictive…once you get the first one, all of your bare patches of skin start talking to you….”decorate me!”

Conqueror Worm

March 22, 2013

This doesn’t say much. But you aren’t suppose to be having the same old fights again.

ryn: lol, the fun thing about you going back and reading all that you have is that i have to go back and re-read what i wrote so i know what the heck you’re talking about in your notes! so thanks!

ryn: yeah, being an OD-all star wasn’t always what it was cracked up to be. I miss it at times when I want attention, but 95% of the time I’m just as happy writing in relative obscurity now.