Bring Me Down

I do not like myself. I don’t think I’m a very nice person. I don’t see how anyone could like me, and assume that when someone is nice to me, that they want something. I know that maybe, not so long ago, I might have been a slightly nicer person, or at least pretended to be. I am not that person anymore. I do not care enough about anything or anyone to try and bring that person back. When I compliment someone, it feels fake or like I want something from them, so I don’t bother.

I am not suprised when I feel alone, I don’t think I even feel sad that I might have hurt other people, I only feel sad that now I have no one to talk to. That is how self centered I am.

I don’t know if being able to admit this makes it marginally better. In a way I hope it does, but then again maybe that’s still just me trying to help myself.

Do I really believe these things about myself, or am I just repeating what others have told me?

Is there really a difference between the two?
I really want to cut…

-x-