a phone call i’d rather not recieve..

ma called me last night crying hardcore.

they have to put my dog to sleep. Lucy. the puppy i brought home at 7 years old and named and cared for and all that jazz. ive never had to put a pet down before (much less the one ive had practically my whole life)and im a lot more upset than i thought i would be…

natalie (my younger sis by 11 months) was like “you havnt lived at home for over 2 years, i thought youd be fine” but Lucy made home still feel like home. even though they changed the flooring, got new furniture, painted the walls, emptied my old room….it was ok because Lucy was there to remind me that this was where i grew up, this was the backyard we’d play in for so many years… so many years ago

i feel like such a pussy for getting worked up about it, poor jon doesnt know how to comfort too well (never lost a pet he loved) but ive been lucky enough to never have to cope with loss (noone close has died) a luck ive never thought to be grateful for before.

i told ma i would go with her to put her down. it only seemed right. me and her brought her home so many years ago, we should be there together when she has to leave…it has to be done the week of finals, which doesnt make this any more easy (and i cant exactly pull “we have to put my dog down” because that might have worked in middle school and what not but in college dogs dont really matter-theyd call me a liar anyways) but after my final im driving home to put down my most faithful friend who gave unconditional love and it really really really freakin bites..