why spoil his surprise

We live in a basement apartment at the moment. Who knows for how long but that’s another story for another time. Anyway, a real shoddy job was done erecting this little apartment. There is only one vent heating/cooling the entire thing – no vent in the bedroom AT ALL. Not enough electrical outlets – no outlets at all on the majority of the walls which means we have run extension cords around the place so we can have a light here or a light there… Yes, it’s not exactly up to code but that is part of the above-mentioned story for another time. It also has holes in two places in the "ceiling" through which my cat has started exploring the area between our ceiling and the floor of the upstairs. This obviously does not thrill me because once she is up there I have absolutely no way to get her out and I have no idea what hazards she might (literally) run across. For all I know there are live wires stored in there. When we moved in here there was a live wire hanging right down into the apartment. (Fixed now). And one of the "holes" she likes to jump up into is actually the place where all of the cords come down into the breaker box! I know for a fact that numerous outlets upstairs and numerous outlets down here are ALL on the SAME breaker because if we run our microwave, the popcorn popper, the tv and a hair dryer at the same time that they are running their microwave (and something else I can’t remember) will throw the breaker. I know, y’all are so thrilled with this information.

Now, to me, a breaker going off — even if it is the one that controls the upstairs fridge — is NOT an "emergency" in the sense that The Act that governs renters/landlords mean when they say a landlord may not entire the tenant’s premises unless there is an emergency. Apparently, my idiot landlord disagrees. Yeah. The breaker blew in the morning (we came home around noon after being at a funeral) and the landlord met us at the door saying he "had" to go into the apartment to flip it back, that he’d called us a few times but didn’t hear from us so he just went in. Yeah. I’m not impressed. Doubly not impressed that the breaker box is in our bedroom and my vibrator was sitting on my bedside table in all its bright blue glory.

Okay, so I started writing with the intention of talking about my cat and this little breaker episode happened about a year ago but I’m calling the ORHT this week to verify the actual rule and hopefully validate my feelings of violation. We’re also going to be setting up a motion activated webcam facing the door. I’m going to catch the fucker if he ever comes in here again and then I’m going to nail him to the wall, I tell you. This is all coming up again because he expects us to be out of the apartment by October 1st – however the ORHT told us that the email "notice" he gave us is invalid and that we don’t have to move, so we’re not. They also said we don’t have to talk to him about it if we don’t want to, that it’s his responsibility as a landlord to ensure that everything is legal. So, that was the short version but either version ends in "he ain’t gonna be happy on October 1st". For various reasons, I suspect he knows it wasn’t a legit notice, that he’s just trying to get us out and that he’s trying to pull a fast one on us. But he’s got another thing coming.

Bottom line, I don’t trust the weasel. So we’re setting up the cam. And also I’m getting BF to put one of those chain locks on the door. Cuz when I’m home alone while BF is at work, I don’t answer the phone, I’m never loud and lately due to my health I sleep at very odd hours and I sleep naked SO Landlord Fucktard will not necessarily know I am home if he decides for whatever reason he wants to explore our abode. I am POSITIVE he has been in here on several occasions when we have not been home so I think him exploring is not out of the realm of possibilities here. And I certainly don’t want to be walked in on while I’m naked and sleeping. So I want a lock that I can lock from the inside and ensure that he won’t be coming in while I am home – save him taking the door off the hinges or cutting the chain. Hopefully if the chain is locked he’ll have enough sense to realize that I am home cuz how can you lock such a chain from the outside? Hopefully.

This is the landlord who cries that he doesn’t have enough money to pay the bills for the house but he’s NEVER home; he’s got an old Mustang in pristine condition with all the fixings, including GPS and a laptop; he just "won" a brand new huge bbq pit/chiminea thing for the backyard; he JUST brought in a renter UPstairs to share the house with him; he’s got scuba gear, a bow and arrow, various hunting rifles and all kindsa toys… Yeah. Poor boy. It’s all bullshit.

Well, if he wants to play dirty. Let him. I’ve got more aces up my sleeve than he could ever fucking dream about. Number one, this house is not zoned properly for a multi-dwelling house. Fuck with me and I’ll make sure you have to pay the fee to apply for that zoning AND all the back taxes you haven’t paid to the government for the years we’ve lived here. Number two, there are numerous maintenance standard breeches in this apartment that I’ll be reporting and that they will order him to fix. Also going to report to the Health Department due to the consistent sewage backup problem and the fact that the carpet has not been replaced in here despite being DRENCHED numerous times and definitely now full of mold. They’ll order him to fix that stuff as well. Shall I go on? Meh. There’s more but why spoil his surprise.

*sigh* yeah.

So I’m a little stressed out. The thought of being spied on and conspired against is not conducive to relaxtion.

Are you proud of me? I’ve written in here a lot lately! Yay me!