prayers and advice need~Long rambling

Where do I even begin to start this entry. I need to get all of this out before I break down. A little background I guess will make this make more sense. My brother and his girlfriend broke up a week ago sunday. My brother is the worlds biggest jerk most of the time. Well, he kept telling her to move out and she finally did. Once she was gone he realized what he had, and wanted her back. He has major issues with anger and his temper. BUT he has never hit her. She has beat the hell out of him plenty of times. She told him that he needed to get into a counsleor and then they would talk. Well, Mr Macho himself didn’t think he needed that. So he has spent the last week and a half staying drunk, trying to numb the pain. His breaking point came today.
He called my mom at work today, and basically told her goodbye, and asked her where dads gun was, cause he was tired of hurting and wanted to kill himself. WE went through this with him once before when him and his daughters mom broke up like 4 years ago. And he attempted to hang himself. But we caught him just in time, but my dad said he was goign to take him to the lake and didn’t take him to a hospital. Things got better. This time, there was no getting better.

He is now in a mental health hospital. I just got back from taking some sweats and clothes to the hopsital for him. They wouldn’t let me see him. I am going to go tomorrow during visting hours.I am so scared for him and worried that the treatment wont work and he will just turn around and find a way to kill himself.

My brother and I don’t generally get along at all. We haven’t since we were little, but this is just about to to kill me. I can’t stop crying. We both get so close when the other one is hurting so bad. Its almost as thought I can feel his pain. The worst of it was trying to explain to the boys why he was in a hospital but wasn’t hurt. Cody flat out asked if he tried to kill himself. I lost it then and just told him not and that is why he is where he is. So he doesn’t hurt himself and he will get better and be happy again
I am sorry that I just keep rambling on. Its to late to call any one on the phone and Russ doesn’t seem to want to talk to me and help me deal with how I feel about this, so I am just trying to make myself feel a little better by writting. I shoud be going to bed, but I am no where near tired enough to sleep, and I know i will just lay there and cry.
If anyone has any suggestions, I will gladly accept them. I just don’t know what I should be doing, I feel so helpless. and I feel I need to do something to help him. My mom is really tore up about it. She is so afraid of losing her baby boy, that is what she told me when we at the hospital. My dad, well he is being his typical pain in the ass self. And I think he is afraid that the truth of our childhood will come out and the truth be known he is the main reason for greg being like he is. But that is a whole other story to be told at a whole other time.

Ali