Well….

this is at least the 15th time since the last time I wrote that I opened this window, hoping to write again. 

I don’t know what to say, though – it’s been so long, and I’ve rather gotten in the habit of no-one ‘hearing’ me, so to speak.

I’m – well, nothing much has changed, externally, for me.  My brain & heart are in all sorts of a mishmash about – well, almost everything. I’m reading about three self help books at once, and terrified and exalted all at once at how many layers of ‘not-me’ I’m peeling off.

I decided to get something I’ve been wanting to have for a while, finally.

Still no new ink, but, I’m getting there. I’m soothing my more/more/more vibes by stretching my ears more – I’m migrating to a 0g in the front, now. The back, is quite stubbornly happy at a 6g, and I’ve decided to leave it be.

My hair & I are having a lovers ball – I think we’ve finally hit the sweet spot.

We’ve passed the one year TTC mark, and in honor of that, I’m trying my best to forget about TTC. We can’t afford any medical assistance, and my insurance doesn’t cover anything. C just got a new job, so we’ll have to check into his. Either it will, or it won’t, and there’s so much more I can be doing with my life other than circling around myself waiting for it happen.

*crooked smile*

I’ve trimmed down my favorites list, a lot – I’ve been feeling rather – I don’t know – selfish, is the best word that I can come up with right now, but it’s not the right one……….I’m taking care of myself, and being really – honest – about things. As much as I can try to. But, another benefit should be that I’ll be a better noter. I won’t be overwhelmed by all that I’ve missed and feel like I ‘need’ to catch up on before actually ‘saying’ anything, so to speak.

So.

Hi.