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hey there boys, girls, and those with a little of both. at the tone it will be 12:57 am……..TONE!!!

i’ve been upr for about 13 hours, nothing much, and i’ve had alot of mountain dew at work. so i guess im not sleeping much tonight. i have, however, stumbled upon a train of thought i’d like to stick with for an hour or so, or however long it takes for said train to derail. this was something my (hopefully) new friend brought up in a previous entry. you meet some genuinely good people on opendiary. i’ve made some very good friends here, and met some pretty big assholes. i dont even know if these people are real or not. my female friend from britain could be some fat bald middle-aged guy in a man-thong. you dont know. but despite that, the idea of that person, it still helps, ya know? some people lie about themselves here, make themselves great, tear themselves down. and yet in a way they’re really themselves here. despite how you are in the real world, you can be anything you want here. if you’re dying of terminal cancer, maybe here you can be a 23 year old marathon runner. if you come from a broken home (like far to many others) you can have a loving family in a good part of town. but here we dont just pretend to be that person, we ARE that person. i understand that this may get a few people wierded out, but that’s ok. for all you guy’s know i could be a 53 year old pedo from jersy. but i’ve been blatantly honest throughout this diary. and i trust that a majority of you have as well.

returning to my previous topic, from which i so gracelessly strayed, there are some good people here. and on other things like this. i read a message board about goths (my people) on an almost daily basis. there’s doc, old grey, miao, and a host of others that post there. some live in the US, others in the netherlands. but they’re all good friends. they band together to bitch at trolls, and carry on amazingly inteligent conversations. that web site has been a godsend to me, as had this one. i’ve helped alot of people that i’ve found on this site that needed just a kind word here or there. i’ve shown some of my most haunting nightmares to people here, and i’ve gotten comfort and offers to call people if i really needed to talk, when that person doesnt even live in my state. i’ve posted humerous anecdotes, and recieved applause on my way with sarcasm. i’ve made friends with people who would never look at me twice in the real world. hell, i almost bought a car stereo via this site. i’ve shown my sister how weak a can truely be…

this place truely has become my safe haven…

now maybe you know why i end my posts the way i do…

nothing from nowhere, im no one at all. nick.