Valentines Day… Fun…Fun…Fun…

Hello my little web-piglets, it is eye. And I.

Happy Valentines day to all those of a catholic/corporate brainwashed variety. My grandad, in a fit of irony, died on Valentines Day, which must have upset my grandma really. I’d have been a bit peeved if I’d wasted money on a present too.

Kate is currently ill with a plague in bed, though I assume she’d have it in any other place. A cupboard or a trampoline for insatance. I, on the otherhand, am at the peak of physical perfection, due to my recent addiction to home made soup from the bakers. I’m now impervious to flu, gout, herpes simplex, bubonic plague and Ghandi. Or something along those lines.

For some reason myspace has sent me a Valentines invitation to a porn site, believing me to be so tragic as to prefer the company of my hand, a tissue and a monitor to my girlfriend. It warms my heart and knees that they know my desires so well.

We took one pope and put him in a house with 20 Slovakian, nymphomaniac hard core porn stars

Vatican TV welcomes you to…

I’M A CELIBATE, GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!

Yes…

We have the pleasure of an inspection rushing towards us soon, so I’d better go and prepare work to fire me…

Ta ta!

Tom Bombadildo, The famed Lord of the Rings themed pornstar

Etoile Filante

February 14, 2007

You’d better read and note my latest entry, bitch.

morganazion

BOOM TARAT TARAT…BOOM TARAT TARAT….TARARAT TARARAT BOOM BOOM BOOM!!!!!! dance yoe/////

RYN: Now THAT was a note. Thank you my darling Tom. You made my day (After Antony made if of course.) Happy Valentines Day to you and The Kate. Wrap her some tissues in a red ribbon. Lee Mee xXx

RYN: Yes but not much about anatomy. Tell me Tomety now why would I need a jockstrap? (even if it was Chanel) Do my ladybits need support and restraint? *laughs* PS – I seem to remember theming your last birthday around Pigs so I totally get it, Merlin. Lee Mee xXx

RYN: Why Professor Bombadil, whilst you offer a charming and interesting theory I must question your credentials. After all you spelt Professor incorrectly. In the spirit of respecting your authority though… am I in the danger group? Should I invest in a VW jockstrap? Lee Mee xXx

*dies laughing* I think you’ll find it’s proffeswyr in Welsh ACTUALLY. Damn you’re getting silly in your old age you mad hippy! PS – Can I order two please? One in pink and a crotchless one too. Just to make it nice for the customers you know? Lee Mee xXx

RYN: Tasty and edgey, my favourite. Especially when it comes to crisps. Chunky ones with edges – like seabrooks and real mccoys. Oh wait you like those insane walkers things don’t you? *snickers* PS – I have to go into a meeting now *boos* so I can’t stay here and play with you all day (Aye aye!!!) but I’ll take too of the babypoos. And wrap them darling won’t you? Lee Mee xXx</center>

PS – Voles attracted to Vaginas? Surely not!?! That’s just alliteration gone MAD! Lee Mee xXx

squidobarnez

hehehehehehehe, you’re so much fun to read. hope Kate feels better soon, and that you really are immune to her plight. *peace signs and smiley faces*

amynancy

February 18, 2007

Just come across your diary…very entertaining, and witty… I like…Well done!!

Tom, I hope your V Day was full of all things beginning with V. Apart from Vomit. Because that aint good.