Commercials are so lame

I don’t watch a lot of tv, but when I do, nothing annoys me more then stupid commercials. I understand, their importance, and why we have to view them, but it annoys me to no end that very few are done properly. Commercials have one goal, make you interested in whatever it is they are advertising. There are two ways I think this should be done.

1) A commercial is to the point. It tells me what it is, why its good, and how I can obtain whatever it is.

2) It uses well placed humor. If a commercial makes me laugh, then I enjoy seeing it. Ones that try to be funny, but fail, do the complete opposite of what they’re supposed to do. Makes me hate the product and choose not to get whatever it is, because I am reminded of how unfunny it was and how it wasted my time.

If commercials followed this formula, I would not mind seeing them in between shows, but unfortunately, most commercials fail at this. Many on tv, I will watch and have no idea what’s going on. I don’t know what the product is. I might be told the name, but thats as far it goes. Some ads that are known for this are ones of a medical nature, pills, supplements, etc….Often they will give the name of the pill, state its side effects, but wont actually say what its for. It will just show a family having a picnic, or two old people watching a sunrise. Complete garbage.

As I mentioned above, when a commercial tries to be funny, but clearly isn’t, I hate it. Fast food commercials are bad at this. I always loved old Wendys commercials back in the day because when Dave was running the show, everything made sense. Dave would come on and say something like this,

"Hey I’m Dave. At wendys we have this new burger which looks like this (shows burger being made) it costs this (shows price) So why dont you come to wendys and give it a taste. I’m sure you will love it."

Thanks Dave. I would like to try that. How hard was that. I understand what’s going on, I know what I’m getting, now I want one. Simple.

Now you might be thinking, who the hell cares? its just commercials. This is true, its not like I cant sleep over this issue. I just don’t get how some of these commercials get made and make it onto tv. Isn’t there a commercial president that can tell when a commercial is decent or not. Why do subway commercials feature a monkey as their mascot? Is there monkey in the sandwiches? Why does money tree keep doing ads with that horribly unfunny caterpillar? Fire that loser.

And just so everyone knows. the best commercials ever are Dodds furniture commercials. Theres a guy that knows his commercials are stupid, but it works. Seeing a guy flying in a super man outfit yelling out "up up and save" is better then any brick commercial which tells me every week that its their one week only sale. I also miss Dave Thomas. He made a great burger.