A long rant about school…

Here we are going into our third week of school and already dealing with issues.  It started last week, I pack my daughter (she’s 7yrs old, 2nd grade) one snack a day that she eats mid/late morning before lunch.  So, every so often I like to pack her something "special", one particular day it was a rice krispy treat.  She came home that day quite upset saying that Mrs.**** said she couldn’t have that anymore because it wasn’t a "healthy choice".  I’ll admit, at that point I was a bit embarassed, thinking oops, maybe that isn’t a smart choice for a mid morning snack.  So, I made it a point to send in "healthier" snacks to avoid my daughter being spoken to again.  Yesterday when she got off the bus I asked her how her day went and was answered with sobs.  She was absolutely hysterical saying that I need to pack her healthy snacks that she was spoken to because she didn’t have a healthy snack and I lied when I told her that she had a healthy snack and it wasn’t fair that **** was allowed to eat CheeseIts everyday but she couldn’t bring in that snack everyday, on and on and on.  Sobbing.  I had packed her a 100 calorie pack of the snack size Pringles.  Is that really that bad of a snack?  I don’t think so, and shouldn’t it ultimately be up to me what I pack my daughter for snack and not her teacher’s decision what she eats.  Am I wrong?

So I console her and explain to her that the pringles were a healthy snack when compared to regular chips, but there are healthier things like fruit, veggies etc.  I don’t want to say too much to her before talking with the teacher and seeing if perhaps there are guidelines that I’m not aware of. 

So we get inside and at my mother’s urging I call the school to speak with her teacher to get the entire story. 

Me: Hi Mrs. ****, this is Marissa *********, *****s mom.

Teach: Hi, how are you?
Me: Fine thank you, you?

Teach: Fine.

Me: I just wanted to call and speak with you about an incident that happened today and I wanted to see if there was more to the situation that **** was leaving out.  I was greeted today by **** crying when she got off the bus because of an incident with snack time where she was told that she needed to make healthy eating choices and what she had wasn’t healthy.

Teach: Oh, ok.

That’s all she said.  "oh, ok" and I waited, after 15 second of silence I finally spoke up again

Me: Are there guidelines set forth for snacks that I’m not aware of?

Teach: No, I am just trying to implement the federal guidelines for healthy eating choices, the school doesn’t have anything specific set forth.  I initially thought that what she had wasn’t healthy, but after looking closer at it I realized that it was ok so told her that it was fine, and she could eat it.  Some parents send in other things and let their children have options, choices, for snack time.  But since ***** buys lunch everyday, she didn’t have any other options.

Ok, first of all, I don’t care if I sent in a damn candybar, is it really her place to say what MY daughter can eat?  Secondly, if the teacher has a problem with it, shouldn’t she be contacting the parents and not making a scene in front of other students w/ my daughter?  Also, what is the issue with her buying lunch everyday? She WANTS to buy lunch everyday.  I know that she’s getting a well balanced meal, and quite frankly it saves me time in the mornings not having to pack her a lunch.

Me:Well I am aware that I sent in a rice crispy treat last week, and looking back I realize that that probably wasn’t appropriate for the time of the day, but it was something special that my daughter enjoyed.  The pringles, well my husband and I do grocery shopping together and were being mindful when choosing snacks for *****.  That’s why we bought the pringles.  The are in single servings so that the serving isn’t too large, and they are the 100 calorie ones, therefore in our eyes that was a healthy choice.

Teach: Well they were ok, but I try to stress to the children that we need to make healthy choices and there are other things out there that would give them more energy and help them through the day. Things like yogurt, cheese, and fruit.  You have to understand that there are many cases now a days of childhood Diabetes and childhood obesity. [she stressed this to me – obesity].  So I just try to encourage the children to make healthy choices.

Now I’m starting to get mad because I realize all of a sudden by her stressing ‘obesity’ that she’s putting things in *****’s head.  On more than one occassion since school has started my daughter has talked about her body negatively.  At first I thought it was just the age or something, but now I’m starting to think that it has to do with her teacher.  On one instance, she told me that she wanted to ‘get rid of my belly’ and I was shocked to hear her talk like that.  She isn’t big by any means, she is in the 90 percentile for both height and weight, therefore she is proportioned appropriately.  Could she stand to lose a few pounds, probably, but it’s certainly not at a point where she is UNHEALTHY.  So basically at this point I feel like the teacher is just not hearing me and I really don’t want to get off bad w/ her because my daughter does have to spend 7hrs a day with this woman.

Me: Well I think that what’s going on is ***** is very confused because my husband and myself talked to her about the snacks we purchased for her, letting her know that they were healthier choices.  She doesn’t understand why there are other children that are eating Cheese Its and such and not being spoken to, but she’s being spoken to for something that my husband and I bought for the sole purpose of being "healthier".

teach: I will talk to ***** tomorrow and let her know that what she had was fine and see if maybe another child had made a comment to her to upset her.  I mean, snack time was at 10:30 and she’s upset about this at 3:30.  Maybe another student said something to upset her.  Again, I’m just trying to implement healthy eating choices.  There are many children that are in daycare at 6 am and need something that is energizing at that point in the day, things like fruit and yogurt or cheese.  I do appreciate you calling and sharing your concern with me.  I intend on addressing this issue at the open house tomorrow night.  I do appreciate your honesty and your cander though, thank you for calling.

Me: Thank you.

Ok, so tonight was the open house.  Do you want to know what the suggestions she gave parents for snack time are??  Here is exactly what she sent us :

Snacks
Purpose:

Snacks provide a time to take a break.  Children receive some additional energy and nutrition  Help establish healthy snacking habits.

Snacks which contain a high concentration of sugar or fat (i.e. cookies, roll-ups, granola bars etc) should be saved for lunch, as so

me children react adversely to too much sugar and there is no opportunity to brush teeth.

Healthy snack suggestions: dried or fresh fruits or vegetables, nuts, sandwhiches, crackers and peanut butter or cheese, pretzels, popcorn, dry cereal, leftover pizza or chicken, yogurt, pudding, soup, banana or pumpkin breads, juice boxes.

I’m sorry, I don’t see how sending leftover pizza in for SNACK is better than a granola bar or low fat pringles?  The calcium in the cheese?  What about calories?  I am certain that a granola bar holds more nutritional value than a slice of pizza (of course that’s if I get a granola bar high in fiber, low in sugar etc). 

Then one of the parents asked about birthday celebrations.  The teacher replied that the office would be sending something home soon regarding the issue.  The parent said that her son’s birthday was this week, that’s why she asked so that she could send something in.  This is a good one….

Teach: we are strongly urging parents to think of other ways to celebrate than food.  I know it’s hard because most of us are used to celebrating with food, but rewarding children with something so high in sugar isn’t really a reward.  I suggest, popsicles or yogurts, or even an art project or friendship bracelets.

Are you serious?!  Unless the school sends me something saying that I can’t send in cupcakes, I’m sending in cupcakes for my daughter’s birthday.  We don’t eat cupcakes everyday, they are a TREAT; something as part of a celebration that we do once a year.  C’mon.  The teacher could tell that that particular parent, and most others in the room didn’t agree with her and she quickly changed the subject.

*sigh*  Should I really have to be dealing with this already?!  Tomorrow I am going to be talking with my neighbor, who happens to be the Director of Curriculum at the school, so he’s on the Board of Ed,  and I’ll ask him for the Wellness Program guidelines.  From my understanding, every school has them and THAT is what needs to be followed, not some ridiculous teacher’s personal beliefs.

So any suggestions or opinions or advice as to how you would handle the situation?  I’m seriously considering setting an appointment with the principal to discuss my concerns, but I am afraid on the same hand that my concerns are miniscule.  To me they are huge, but is that what the principal will see?