~The Best 4th of July..

………WAS 1995

Our Family was never that big on the 4th of July.. We got some fireworks and watched others. But in 1995 Brian was working. Sarah and Nathan and I joined our neighborhood gathering.. It consisted of the Borders, the Richards, the Kerrs, and a few other people. We all set off our Fireworks together. All the kids played with one another. The Borders made Homemade ice Cream and shared it with us. It was a good time!

The following year Colorado Banded Fireworks.. Oh you could buy them, you just couldn’t shoot them off.. If that made any sense… So we did buy them and planned to shoot them off in the winter of 1996 sometime. We still gathered at the Borders, and had a barbecue and played some Croquet. Some of the neighbors were brave to set off the fireworks and we watched those.

Then Nathan died.. Those Fireworks we bought just sat in the bag for a few years. In 1997 I hibernated in the basement on the 4th of July. Couldn’t bare to hear the fireworks or see them. a day that Nathan enjoyed so much. Sarah did want to go out and see them. I feel selfish cause I denied her that opportunity. I just couldn’t.. and so her 4th in 1997 was a Bummer.

In 1998 we were in California. Staying with my Husbands sister. They had Fireworks. It was ok. In 1999 I was in Colorado and camping with friends on the 4th.. that was ok too.

This year I was here. Watched the Capital Fourth 2000 on TV.. That was interesting. Then went out and watched the fireworks from our Deck on our roof. Could see alot of the neighborhood fireworks and over the city. What a show! I could look forward, left and right and see several hours worth of fireworks. I sat up there for a while watching and thinking.. The fireworks really did nothing for me.. I don’t find alot of Joy in it all anymore… But watch I did.