~A Tweak

This past week I was with a group of people. We were talking about Colorado… I said something about one day maybe living there again. She said that you can never go back that it is never the same. I KNOW that. I have always heard that, but I have entertained the thought of going back and being where all my Friends are. I got to thinking on what she said….. The thought of going back…. I don’t want it to be the same.. It could never be the same. In some ways it would be Hard cause such Heart Ache happened there. One of the reasons I am glad we don’t live there is I haven’t had to see the Boys Grown up. They would be about 20 now.

I thought about a few Entries back how I wrote about people who are at various years and things that still seem to be hard for them.. I do have things that are Hard for me… or things that sometimes Tweak me just a bit. The difference between those People and me is they are more Verbal, show Emotions more Openly. Usaully I have to Dwell on something to really feel.. Most of the time I don’t allow myself to go there. But if I want to be Honest… There are things that that sometimes cause me to stop, things that sometimes give me a Tweak.

~ Whenever I think of our Church in Colorado, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I go to that Death Hospital is always hard, I think of Nathan.
~ Listening to Kenny G is Difficult some times… usually takes me back to that 1st year, Weeks, Days.
~ Whenever I see Little Debbie Snacks in the Store, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I buy a Jar of Hawaiian Delight Baby Food, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Boy helping his Mom in a Store, I think of Nathan and usually stop to watch.
~ Whenever I see a Comic Card Shop, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Goosebump Book or Discovery Book in the Store or Library, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see the Charlette Hornets Team Name, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see Hot Wheel Cars, I think of Nathan
~ Whenever I see a Black Toothbrush, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see on TV Double Decker Buses, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Snowman, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see Kids playing Cops and Robbers, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see G.I. Joe Men, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Bunkbed in a Store, I think of Nathan…
(They got the Coolest beds now.. I saw a Bunkbed with a Military Tent around the bottom and a Slide going down from the top of the Bunkbed. How cool is that?)
~ Whenever I play with the Tennis Ball and Otto, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Boy and his Dog, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Boy getting his Haircut, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I play the early 1990’s Computer Games, I think of Nathan. His Game Name is saved on the Disk.. “Nate-the-Great”
~ Whenever I hear my Nephew laugh, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I read about someone Reading to their Kid, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Brother and Sister together, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Boy Riding a Bike, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I see a Boy Fishing, I think of Nathan.
~ Whenever I think of the 4th of July, or See Fireworks, I think of Nathan.

Usually whenever I see these things I just Smile & Remember
AND
Sometimes they give me a little emotional Tweak.