I need to write this down…

**** While it’s still fresh… so I can remember the feeling later. ****

Dear Mr. Eight,

You intrigue me. Maybe even a little more than I was intrigued by Max when I met him.

The other day you held my hand and I felt you shaking. You said you feel something for me that you can’t explain and that it bothers you. You said you need to figure out what it is. I just smiled cuz I know you really like me. I can see it in the way you get frustrated when I can’t hang out with you. I can feel it in the urgency in which you hold me. I can hear it even in the way you say my name; awkwardly as though your lips only recognize the consonants, your voice breaking with each vowel. It’s sweet to see you nervous.

We make each other drowsy; comfortable and relaxed like a 2nd home. I hate that I feel this way with you. It scares me, so I put up walls. I make things more difficult. I ignore you and try to extinguish the flames between us by stomping on all the beauty of it.

I can’t get too close to you. For what? So I can have my heart broken twice in one year? No thank you. It’s still too soon. But I do appreciate the little bit of hope you’ve given me. Thank you for that.

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September 19, 2013

I can relate to this. I had to kind of run away and stop another relationship/dynamic from happening because I knew it would end ugly and it was too soon to get into another relationship. I think you did tr right thing. It’s no good to jump into relationships ESP after a painful one there’s just alot of baggage still

September 19, 2013

Wow… this is like a beautiful poetic dance with words. I am catching up on your entries so I started with your next entry. I am really stricken to tell you to think on this now. Don’t write him off because of cliches about rebounds. –