Broken

the days grow long and the nights grow shorter the thoughts all become one conscience motion strumming the strings of a guitar that i’ve never learned to play without you without it without us who am i the theme music sounds quietly in my mind’s carnival slow and rhythmatic stressing the edges….pushover the words aren’t here anymore and a piece of me is forever lost and void to you now you’ll never know never solve the puzzle never build the epiphany inside the lost embrace words entangled our hearts and souls with our minds and hopes and destroyed the faith that somehow with effort blood sweat and tears you will succeed you will grow youwillfalter

the afterglow all-consuming burns in my veins hot and delicious the flashover becomes fully developed nothing will survive the cold inside without you tempts the evilness in me iknowyouarethere i feel you with your hands around my throat tightening the grip pushing me under and the sanity bleeds out from the nothingness we consider ourself to be….doesn’t work that way no control

if loneliness could cushion me

then call me suspended in air

this weight keeps on pushing me

till my scars are threadbare

reminiscent of the past

before my eyes shadows play

this youth will never outlast

the light passing from each day

when the world came crashing down on her shoulders she never knew or perhaps she could have better prepared herself. where in darkness all consuming, devours her focus, she knows it’s only her own shadow cast heavily upon her heart. yet how she feels it beating – she could lose herself to the pattern, the rhythm of the thunder as she counts another passing day. she finds herself thinking if our lives are really counted be the years we tally on out of age or perhaps how many times your heart has beaten throughout those many times your heart has ever beaten. she sees herself as something different, a little more strange or maybe it’s a little less normal….whichever. at times it’s easy to forget what drives her on. it’s just an aching pattern daytodayweektoweekmonthtomonththensuddenly

she realizes another year.

lost somewhere between now and then.

staring at the sky the heavens seem less comforting as the throbbing aches through her body. it felt so normal and yet so foreign….things can change in a mere second, which way will the world turn?

what drives you on can drive you mad