My fellow commuters are odd. In an odd way.

I’m so tired today that it’s a wonder I’m still awake. Today has been an off day. Not a bad day, not by a longshot, but just off. Like I almost fell asleep in math. And I kept trying to tell this guy that I gave him two quarters, when I really gave him two nickles, but it didn’t matter anyway because I gave him one coin too many when I was buying my lunch.

Meh. I just need more sleep.

I’m a firm believer in destiny. Call it karma ("Get it? Car-ma? Har har har!"), call it fate, call it a gift from the universe, I believe in it. I am really, really cynical, and I no longer believe in the pure goodness of humanity, but at the same time, I’m an optimist, through and through. I take the smallest wonders and turn them into flawless moments I was given by the gods. I can see the beauty in everything.

This entry really doesn’t have anything to do with an event today. Today wasn’t that exciting. I spent most of it reading Nylon, studying for a test, taking said test, and almost falling asleep in math. There’s no fate in there, really. I’m just rambling. I have words in my head.

Anyway.

Take my friendship with Casey.

Our last names both start with the letter S. Freshman year, our biology seated the class alphabetically. Of course, Casey was sitting across from me. Four days later, we were best friends. Five years later, we’re the same person. It’s so funny how such a little thing as classroom seating can lead to a leading character in your life. And if it seems like I bring her up a lot, it’s because I do. I admittedly have very few people in my life. It’s not a bad thing to me. I’m a very reclusive person, and so having a small group of really close friends is my thing. I could never act the part of the social butterfly. So the people I do become friends with tend to become really good friends because I nurture those relationships very closely. They get so much of my attention.

So I love how something trivial and meaningless ends up becoming something wonderful. I wouldn’t have fallen in love with my favourite band (Cold War Kids) if I hadn’t seen their CD in WalMart.

It’s the little things that lead me to believe that fate is real. Yeah, there’s nothing too special about finding a great band via WalMart, but what about teaching my niece that it’s not only okay to be different, but cool? I don’t say anything about it. I don’t act like I’m an amazing person because I’m an oddball. But the one time she’s seen me around non-relatives/non-Casey-types was the one moment that made her want to be something novel and interesting and weird. I find that significant.

I don’t know, maybe it’s all really just a lie we’re told to keep us believing in something that doesn’t exist. But I don’t think that’s true.

At the very least, I really, really hope it’s not.