The Employee’s Guide to Curbing Office Rage

Does your printer have a password feature? Our does, and it won’t print the document unless you put in your code. It can be a pain in the ass if you have 20 documents to print, but so is tracking down your stuff and re-sorting it.

You should put a book together filled with various stories from various people. It would be great.

ryn: You can configure it to print that way, or you can print without. I only use it when I’m printing something personal, or if I want to make sure it doesn’t get dumped in the recycle box. That’s how my coworkers sort the jobs left on the printer – they take theirs and pitch the rest.

I think I worked for the same company you’re currently working for at some point. Either that or the bigwigs went to the same Moron Manager school.

RYN: His old name used to be Sickboy21ToLife. I met him in…2001 I think. Really nice guy, I posted pictures from when we met. Maybe that’s what you were thinking of?

When I worked in an office (before this cushy job at home) I had a printer, a copier, and a fax machine in my own office- and a door I could close! I don’t know how I manage to get the perks, I just do. As for Euro-lady, what’s the big deal? Consider it a concession. She had to give up the vastly superior metric system for our backasswards English Standard System. She’s paying aplenty.

RYN: It was The Majority Report (Wed). The author they were talking to wrote this article: http://nypress.com/17/28/news&columns/LiamScheff.cfm

All you need is a red swingline. Damn, it feels good to be a gangster

I should clarify the lady isn’t really European. Just a weirdo. I’m not one of those “conform-or-die” Americans, but I will poke fun at foreigners from time to time. —

Heh heh… this is somewhere between “Office Space” and “Seinfeld”! I feel sorry for you, really I do!

CHRIST I know what you’re talking about to a TEE! I mean really, it’s almost every day that we get an office-wide email “who took my Weight Watchers Chicken Penne.” And the printer thing happens at my office too, only worse because we’re all artist-people and work closely together and there is always this underlying hatred over the printer, esp. about people in other departments using the printer.

I have a coworker who clips her toenails and shaves her legs dry with a straight razor at her desk.

Oh yes, you’re back. 🙂 (Ain’t you AIN’T never seen the worst of the right-and-left thing until you’ve pushed a stroller through the mall.)

And. And and and and and and. (You’re back but my brain isn’t. It was a long night……)

My personal favorite at the office was also printer related. We had one HUGE color printer that is for photo quality printing for grant proposals. The cartridges cost $600 a piece. People are only supposed to use it if they have a need for photo quality printing. Of course, when I get there, the machine is jammed up with someone printing out 55 copies of the sheet music to “Can’t Smile

Without You” by Barry Manilow – I kid you not! I had to wait an hour and a half for my document to print. I was FURIOUS. (I might have been less mad if it had even been a decent song – but Manilow?????)

People have such odd rules in their head about what they need to do for the world to be alright. I bet you blocking that woman from passing on your right upset her whole day, if not week. Maybe it will help her break her OCD in the office? * The printer person also sounds like an OCD’r; a place for everything and everything in it’s place!

Interesting..I think you should watch “Office Space” and take some notes lol seems very similar to your situation…I know what you mean about the people stealing lunch from the refrigerator, I hated it..it happened so often that finally I had to make a memo and had it out to everyone stating that if they didn’t have enough money to ask someone who did and we’d be more than happy to help em out=)

You share a printer with 50 or 60 employees?? That’s INSANE! At my place of business, each department has its own printer. I share a laser jet printer with exactly 5 people. It helps to keep my sanity. ;^) Eric

there actually is a manual.. its like a gag gift, but i think u definitely shud give it to ur peers. i think its called behavior for the anti social or soemthing. its funny i bought it cuz i thought it was seriously good advice for one of my friends

We have a “housekeeping commitee” on each team that will throw out everything in the refrigerator once a month and send out a nasty gram when the women’s restroom looks worse than a frathouse toilet. This came after someone left their lunch in the fridge so long that it actually liquified, ate through the brown paper bag, and ruined everything else in the fridge. Funny how that one wan’t stolen.

I don’t get offices and the politics there. I don’t have TIME for it. But everyone has to do it. I don’t, and people think I am nuts, but thats okay, I am somewhat nuts. 🙂

Funny stuff, Darling.

You should star in “Office Space II.” Instead of taking a baseball bat to the printer, you could take a baseball bat to the printer nazi.

I can soooo relate to this

I had the distinct displeasure of finding my financial statements lost amidst somebody’s childbirth pictures. Not for nothing, I don’t need to know ANYBODY that well.

RYN: Connecticut would be the Nutmeg State and home to yours truly. Pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Parliament, sir.

RYNRMN: I acquired ‘not for nothing’ from folks at my last job. Specifically a woman of Sicilian descent who grew up in the eastern part of CT, near Rhode Island, though you’d have thought she was from Lawn Guyland instead. I grew up in northern Ohio, where they insist that I now speak as though I live in Brooklyn. So you know New England well?

oooo. i have major office rage over the parking garage. let me write the parking garage chapter!

ryn; So what should people in glass houses throw? Melons? Tantrums? Rugs? You’d think real estate agents would have a hard time selling a glass house … “Sure, it’s close to schools, bus and shopping … but you can’t throw stones …”

RYN: Only if you let me wear your lettermans jacket. 😉 Be well,

I almost died at the thought of you standing shoulder to shoulder at the wall! Didn’t she say ANYthing? I mean, good grief, what a dumbass.

Where I work there are only three faxes on the entire floor and two printers. There is someone there to distribute all of the faxes and everything that has been printed, bringing them to each persons desk. That person is me – and it sucks. I like your way better

ugh – I will never understand people who take other people’s lunch. I could write a book on this subject (office etiquette, that is).

You know, I asked for advice, not rudeness. If you would have read my entry correctly you would have seen that i do NOT plan on getting married until I’m out of college…which is in 3 years or so. I also did not change my mind over night or ignore the notes i got. I said that if and when he proposes is when i’ll make my decision. And don’t call me immature if you don’t even know me. Thanks.

i read the entries and the notes of One Step Closer and I agree with you. You weren’t being rude and it did seem as though she made a hasty decision overnight, after disregarding all the help she asked for. I’m not leaving my name because I don’t need her to dogpile my entry. I wish her luck and clearer vision.

RYN: do you know where i can get rockefeller caliber funding?

I do not mind when people disagree with me. That’s why i asked for opinions in the first place:to get other peoples opinions. There’s a way to be nice about it though, and you weren’t. You called me immature because I decided that when he asks me to marry him i’ll decide then, which is what you seem to understand as me changing my mind over night, which i don’t see it as.

There were other people that left me notes saying that they believe i should wait a while before getting engaged, but they did it in a different way, a nice way, which is something i have no problem with whatsoever. You called me immature, which is not something that you really need to be labeling me as. I did not ask people to give their opinion as to whether I am mature or not.

RYN: What’s 1337? I tried http://1337.friendtest.com, but it said there wasn’t a quiz for that name. Eric

RYN: OH! *LMAO* I totally missed that. Yeah, I know what that means, in hindsight. I just didn’t put 2-and-2 together. *still laughin’ at myself* Eric

grrr. we have a printer monitor/sales guy who likes to bring me my documents. but i print in bulk, too. so i have to go back anyway. grrr!

RYN: Unfortunately, I am not eligible for any other insurance. NONE. This is a COBRA conversion policy and the only option. And, yes, I am aware that it is tax deductible, but that makes no difference as I already pay almost no tax, and as for a medical savings account, my company doesn’t offer it. Thanks for your concern though.

RYN: COBRA only lasts for 18 months. After that you have to apply for a conversion policy under the HIPPA laws. The conversion policy will cost me $200 more than my already high $300 per month COBRA rate, but if I turn it down, I will have nothing and will not be able to change my mind in the future. $500 per month for insurance that won’t even cover my child is hard to accept.

RYN: Thank you for saying all that. I agree with you completely, and generally, it hasn’t been an issue. Besides this man, only one other man has let it stand in the way. I don’t apologize or feel bad about the disease. Contracting it has actually been good for me in some ways. And physically, I don’t ever get symptoms so the only hard part is having to tell someone.

RYN: Now that…is odd. There are links to most of the sections on top, and they’re there for me. No one else left notes saying that there’s a problem. (Maybe no one looked, though?) What browser do you use? I’ll tell Josh that it isn’t working and see what he thinks.

its perculiar…but we Aussies..drive on the left and walk on the left…but then we are upside down to rest of humanity…

you need to write more, sweetheart. I come here and want to read your stuff, but theres not enough new. I guess I will just have to raid the back-logs.

You slay me! Practically brought me to tears. Oh the days of temping for the government… Have you seen the BBC show “The Office”? You might find it good therapy if you haven’t already.

RYN: I don’t think I’ve effectively communicated what the author is saying. He isn’t against ‘brazen masculinity’ (nor am I, for that matter) but only against a concept of masculinity that some people have that might allow them to change a tire, for instance, but forces them to choose between knowing how to change a diaper or being somehow ‘female.’ You don’t strike me as the kind of guy who

lives in constant fear of perceives weakness and therefore perceived femininity, or who is terrified of a woman holding power in the world at large.

Ah the corporate life. Don’t you just love it?

RYn: O.k. I’m done for real. 🙂 Be well,

RYN RMN: I’m JUST sayin’….:) if she was 21, 31 might seem old to her. 🙂

RYN: “Who’s the REAL asshole here?” Answer: You. You really should know better than to ask me rhetorical questions, or to make statements like “We honor Dr. King not for the man he was, but for what he was able to inspire others to do.” Just because people do/did good things in his name doesn’t absolve him from being an asshole.

You have the best noters. This was a very funny entry. I needed a good chuckle.

RYN: When you are right you are right. King removed Rustin from his staff after a confrontation with Adam Clayton Powell Jr. who accused the two of having a homosexual affair. So Strom Thurmond’s name is misplaced in that entry. Since ’60 is before ’63, it IS before the march.

A. Philip Randolph later asked Rustin to plan the march, but even after that march, the NAACP leader Roy Wilkins also turned stag on him and refused to publicly acknowledge his role in the march, pretty much for the same reason as I described. Maybe I should change the name of my entry to “Dr. MLK Jr. AND the NAACP suck.”

Anyway, I almost enjoyed your last few notes, as they were rooted in fact. That is, until the last one. If name-calling makes you feel right, go right on ahead. I don’t gain anything by proving myself right, and I’d be lying if I said I gave a damn what you think about me or my argument. Feel free to bitch and accuse me of whatever you wish, but I probably won’t be noting you back for a while.

RYN: Actually, that isn’t it at all. It is because out of all the people who noted in to crticize that entry, you are the only one who actually confronted the facts rather than attempting to justify his actions. It all seems really well done until you broke down at the end. As for Rustin being an asshole, I don’t like Communists, but I have to respect the man for standing up for himself.

Sounds like a book to me!

RYN: Oh, that already happened. Remember me writing about my birthday back in October? Remember I broke up with her over it, for a week? Eric

🙂

RYN: Possibly. So, did watching the Chargers/Jets game bring back horrific memories for you, because it sure seemed like deja-vu to me.

RYN: That was a great note you left. I love having a male perspective. I think after a few more dates I’ll lose all self control and just kiss him and see what he does, but I am so worried that I will scare him away completely. I really would rather keep him as a friend than chase him away completely, so I must be careful.

You are right, and I know it. I am going to remedy this situation.

this is soo real it’s like bizarre.

RYN: I think you are right about the asymptomatic shedding being a prelude to an outbreak, but I still would rather tell someone than act like there is no chance of transmission.

So why don’t you write much? Are you just here to get into women’s heads?

RYN: Forgive me for not being clear in that entry, I’m specifically talking about the “fundamentalist” Christians and in the first part of the entry do try to make it clear. I do realize and have typically written that I know many Christians who think differently. That entry was written for a few Fundamentalists who had commented on my previous “Gays and God” entry and seem completely brainwashed.

Seriously, it would only take me one attempt to beat you severely. Seriously.

RYN: As for the uneducated, many of the Fundie Christians I have known have been very educated. The problem is that they quit thinking for themselves when it comes to religion and refuse to open their mind in that area.

RYN:Thanks. I got so many notes in reply to that entry in such a short space of time. Its scary!! Lol. Hope ur good. Bluemountain -x-

Hello there! OMG, nice picture, you’re a hottie!!! I always wondered. And Caramia’s back, be still my heart! 🙂

Caramia, please make your entries public…pretty please…do it for Parliament the hottie and me…

ryn: My house address was a little off. But it’s off on Mapquest too. They must have changed the numbering scheme after it was officially ‘filed’.

ps–oh, I see what you mean. Your area doesnt have the “Urban Areas” link that the other areas do that I have looked up. Try looking for someone else’s place in a different part of the country. The Urban Areas link is MUCH clearer and in color and some photos are as recent as 2004.

You’re hot. I love the new photo on your front page!!! Weekend plans????

i completely understand the “european”. It is an OCD thing. If walking with someone–friend/date/ etc.–I MUST be on their left. If for some reason they get to MY left I am sure something bad will happen. Same with sitting in the movies. Why antagonize her by trying to pass her on a side that clearly causes her stress. Have some compassion.

RYN: Yeah, all dogs DO go to heaven. Not a bad movie, I reckon. And wow, you certainly get lots of notes!

RYN – Thank you, thank you, thank you. I’ll let you know.

RYN: I agree with you. I think the letter was a big mistake, but at the same time, I don’t regret sending it. I am really done with this. The waiting is too much. As for why an e-mail, I chose that because I don’t expect him to respond and therefore the whole thing will be over without confrontation or hearing him say, “I just want to be friends.” It’s easier this way, for both of us.

RYN: Thank you for all your support. I don’t think I have a fear of rejection, so much as a fear of confrontation. You are right; it would probably be good for me to confront someone face to face. I also chose to send the e-mail because I think I communicate more effectively in type, and I won’t laugh. When I get nervous, I laugh, so it is hard to have a serious conversation sometimes.

And by the way, I liked how you capitalized “Real Life”. I sometimes forget that that exists somewhere.

You make me laugh. Really Hard. “Peace Out.”

Well then…..I guess it’s Plan B!

Are you trying to tell me you’ve looked at my tits again again today?

I haven’t felt this violated since I was kicked out of the Olive Garden!!!

You’ve got fan mail! Or, fan notes. I guess.

This made me laugh. Sadly, because it is all too familiar.

Duke: my webpage is up and running. If you’d rather use a check, let me know where to mail you the donor form. Thanks a lot for doing this. I won’t call you a dirty slut too often in the future. Oh, and the photo on your main page made me ovulate. http://aidsmarathon.com/participant.asp?runner=SF-0223&EventCode=RW05

RYN – You know that if you were gay or I were a straight chick we’d already be married, right? Love, Bitchlips, aka

RYN: I think I have been way too flexible. I think that’s part of the problem. I was always tolerating men instead of liking them, and of course, I am still single even with that because I eventually I would get tired of tolerating. Now I want someone who I actually like to be with. Novel concept, huh? Perhaps I am too picky, but I don’t really think that is it. I just expect more.

I am attracted to a variety of types, but to make things last, I need something specific. It’s okay to tolerate to get a date and to have fun, but I want marriage and I don’t want to spend my life tolerating someone else just so I am not alone.

If I were to list the traits I won’t compromise on, the list is pretty small, yet those traits seem impossible to find. Namely, I need a communicator. Finding a man who talks is impossible! And, I need someone open and honest. Again, very hard to find. Plus, I require someone who is responsible, and that is probably the hardest thing to find of them all.

I won’t rule someone out for being too social or too happy, but the chances of me liking them for a lifetime is small.

What dating site have you had the most success with?

RYN: Yes. Slut.

RYN: Oh just bite my butt why don’t you? 😉 Be well,

This entry was hysterical. Sounds like a day in my office, except on a smaller scale. Arguments over chip bags and fights with the vending machine pretty much reign here. And the arrogant a-holes attorneys who run the place – They are always good for a laugh. ~rory

LOL-these would of made for some great Seinfeld episodes.

Nice…..rock?

I am sooo home, I don’t know what took me so long, from when u gave me advice, and everyone else did too, but I guess I just had to get it out of my system for good what I wanted, or I never would have been truly happy at home, which I am now. I found a friend, actually, Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, is taking my apt. Thank God, I didn’t need the bad credit, and she leaves her husband every 2 weeks.

She needs a place. Which is fine by me, I HAVE a home, and I am lucky, LUCKY as hell, to still have it to go to. *smiles*. I am very happy, and J is too. Thank you for the tough love. I am sorry it took me a couple more weeks & crazy ones at that, to take the advice.

RYN: I’m not exactly sure what changed my mind, but I now feel that I want to create my own big family, where as before, I was trying to fit myself into a family that was already established because I didn’t know how to make my own. I didn’t have faith in my own abilites, and I didn’t have faith that I could have something of my own.

Thanks for the note – I knew my husband’s comment was as erroneous as my ignorance of Ash Wednesday as I work with people from other countries of the Catholic faith as well. Regarding your entry here, have you ever seen that film Office Space. You really get that sense of Office Rage you describe and in the end the whole place burns down thanks to some weirdo with a stapler obsession. Brilliant!

RYN: You are absolutely right. Thanks for the reality check. It’s so hard not to want more. What should I do? I don’t see how I can stop wanting more, so do I end the friendship? I really don’t know what to do and how to stop feeling this way.

RYN: Actually, I kind of liked the “honey”. Baby is a whole nother thing. Sugar is also awful. That’s a nice suggestion, but I often think my ego is already too big. But maybe you’re right. I am soooo worth being with! He should want me! So, he must not be as smart as I think considering he doesn’t. Yeah, I will keep telling myself that.

RYN: Exactly how far back have you read?? Didn’t I write those long before you came along? But thanks for the tip. I have started to accumulate a chapter of the basics and I will add those once I find them. Even the basics end up being dozens of entries, but the sheer number in itself is a good representation of me- the prolific overthinker.

RYN: No, baby. He ain’t you.

Nice balloons!

(You’re not such an asshole.)

i love you, too. 🙂 been a long time since my last visit to the house o’funk, sugar, but not for lack of trying….glad to see you’ve opened up the front door for me again. devotedly,

You could grab that woman and french kiss that… I’m positive that this action will ensure that you won’t need to pass by her at all any more in the future!

*giggles* Yeah, you’re quite right. And those geeks that created Google… well, they probably have some stuff to say about Office Rage too.