Why do we try to train the life out of lovers?-II

Would we try to remove the colors on the clouds left by the departed Sun? Why then, attempt to erase the memory of a departed lover?
 
“Your life is the perfect example of your unconscious desire to be unfairly treated.”*
 
Would we have our muscles removed from our body because the bench supports us? Why then, become dependent upon a lover?
 
“We NEVER really see another, but only our perception of them. What you are “seeing” is all your unresolved hurts from the past.”*
 
“Perception is a function of the body, and therefore, limits awareness.”*
 
Would we stop trusting the sea to take care of itself? Why then, would we think we can “take care of” a lover?
 
“I am in charge of my life and everything that seems to happen to me, (good and “bad”) is because I’ve asked for it and it has been given me as I’ve asked.”*
 
Would we tame the roughness out of a beach, thereby removing its personality? Why then, attempt it with a lover?
 
“You must take full responsibility for any hurt you experience at the hand of another. Are you awake enough right now, to see you create your own pain?”*
 
Does the sea check with us before it storms to see how we feel about it? Why then, do we blame someone else for the way we choose to feel about an action they take? 
 
 “Whether you stay or go in a relationship is not the question. The question is, whether you stop blaming the other person for how you feel. If you change your mind, the decision about staying or going will evaporate. It becomes immaterial. Why would it matter? Nothing someone else does or says can hurt you unless, you cooperate with them.”*
 
 “When you’re attacked, it is a call for help. When you suffer because of the attack, you’re counter-attacking.”*
 
Why do some of us pick lovers who are not emotionally available to us?
 
“The reason that nice available people seem boring to some of us is because they threaten us. The ego equates emotional danger with excitement and we think that nice, available person isn’t dangerous enough. The irony is, the opposite is true. Available people are “dangerous” because they confront us with the possibility of real intimacy. They might actually hang around to get to know us and melt our defense, through love.

Available people are frightening. If you’re not attracted to them, it’s because you’re not available yourself.”*
 

– Continued –