Boring dreck

 Remember how great Garbage was? I had their album Version 2.0 and wore it out. I always wanted to look like Shirley Manson. Her hair and dress in the "I Think I’m Paranoid" music video are definitely girl-boner material, in my opinion.

Today I had makeshift plans to hang out with Boyfriend and two of our mutual friends, Ryan and Zach. I had seen them around Christmastime for our friend’s Christmas party and we said we’d all hang out again before Ryan goes back to school this upcoming weekend. One thing I might mention about myself is that I’m one flaky cunt. I never stick to plans with people that I don’t really, really care about and there are only a couple of those in my life. The rest are just people I like getting shitfaced with (since I don’t really know how to make conversation with them otherwise–anxiety is so fun). Since our plan was to hang out around 3:00 PM on a Monday, I knew getting shitfaced wasn’t really in the cards. I’m not that far off the wagon. So, I completely dipped out. This seems to happen a lot. I’ve always been kind of a loner and while I like to be around people some of the time, most of the time I do not (excluding those rare gems of people that I mentioned earlier). I’d much rather stay home and read or watch movies. I don’t consider myself abnormal because of this but I know it’s not socially acceptable to prefer to be alone most of the time. What can you do.

Speaking of cool people that I actually try to spend time with, I have a friend named Jessica. We’ve known each other since middle school and always drifted around the same circle but never really spent any time together. Lately we reconnected and have been getting together more often. (It helps that her boyfriend and my boyfriend are good friends.) I had tried to make plans with her this week but she is working too much and will be too busy. It’s disheartening. I would really like to get my hard cider/girl talk on.

I realize I write about alcohol and getting drunk a lot. It might give you the impression that I’m a complete lush. I promise you, I’m really not! I drink way less than most people I know (of course that’s not really saying much when you live in a town that only offers bars as a source of entertainment on weekends).

I went to Walmart today to grocery shop. I’m trying to eat healthier so I bought some fruit and veggies, yogurt, some healthful cereal and a package of chicken breasts. That’s quite a departure from the plethora of microwaveable meals, bags of Doritos and Ramen noodles I usually buy. I also noticed the candy isle was all decked out for Valentine’s Day. Normally I couldn’t give a shit less about Valentine’s Day. It’s not like I’m anti-VDay but I’m certainly not a hopeless romantic who marks down the days on the calender. Either way, I thought I’d be silly and cheesy and get Boyfriend a really dorky Valentine’s Day gift. I bought him a red heart-shaped box of chocolates (ultra cheese alert!) and a Starbucks Valentine’s Day gift pack complete with two coffee mugs and a package of Starbucks coffee. I think he’ll really appreciate that gift. He’s a coffee fanatic. I seriously doubt he’ll get me anything but that’s okay. I’m more of a giver than a receiver anyway. Although having some chocolates would be nice…