Father Time

My deceased grandfather’s birthday was today. I got to work super early…30 min early. Feel so sad and depleted. Anabel was biting and pulling my hair today. Miss Clark still creeps me out and now it’s because she is too nice. My job feels incredibly hard. I cried today again in front of two coworkers.  Rent is due today but i have no way of knowing how to pay since they changed management. I only have cold running water & my face it feels ruined with dark marks. I hit a curb on the way home. I only put $6.95 on gas today(all I had). I spent $5 on the school lunch. I had a headache the whole day. The lady I pray with in the morning was rushed to hospital for high blood pressure a few hours later m. When I told my family to vote for me, no one did. I feel sad all the time and miserable. I HATE EVERYTHING…I wear a smile and laugh….just like robin williams….you never knew he was sad because he was busy being a light to everyone else.
God, what’s going on in Israel?  Why is the holy land being attacked? What’s going to happen in this world and life in general? I feel like I’m  a burnout, and I feel hopeless.
what to do father? Needing your assistance to heal my life amen