Wednesday 9/11/24

4:05a.m. I’m up already. I had a lousy night. I had too much coffee and was OCDing. I was thinking about all the books I could buy this month. I don’t believe I’m actually getting $179 but I have it spent. Thinking about it and thinking about it kept me up. I’m crazy as a loon sometimes.

I watched a little bit of the debate. They were asking Trump and Harris about the war in Europe. Trump seemed defensive and edgy. He claimed he could end it in two days. From what I read in the paper Harris put Trump on the defensive over abortion rights and kept him there. The paper also said Trump .add up crazy lies about immigrants eating pet dogs. I’ll have to read more but from what I know so far Harris lwnef the night.

I hope the they keep their promise and get me up early today. The aide just said daylight doesn’t start until 6:00. I understood they would get me up at 5:30. I hope I can get up sometime before breakfast We will see.

10:11 I had a very busy morning. The aide got me up just in time for breakfast. I had toast and scrambled eggs. I read an article in Tbe New York Times about the debate. By all accounts arris won but.her performance didn’t change undecided voters . Just when I finished the article Darla came . She took me to the gym. I did all my exercises. It took about thirty minutes. Then I was taken to the Fiesta Room for the coffee social. I had one cup then left for my room.

I called Chocolatechip when I got back. She went Walmart shopping early this morning. Chocolatechip said she bought everything on her list. It didn’t come to what she expected. They hen she bought a ton of groceries. I said I’m glad you had a good outing. We also talked about the debate. Then I went on about getting this big fat Amazon gift card next week. I told her about all these books I want to buy. She said I should invest in another Kindle or tablet Chocolatechip made a good point.

I have today’s menu. They are serving pepperoni pizza, cucumber salad and cookies for lunch. For dinner its baked fish, vegetable blend, potatoes, a dinner roll and jello. I love pizza and could eat it every day.

1:46p.m. I’m having a very good day. After coming back from the coffee I read the New York Times until lunchtime. I went back to the Fiesta Room for lunch. Two cookie and two big slices of pizza filled me up. I went back to my room and read more of the paper. I read several good articles about the debate . Then the aide put me in bed and cleaned up. He did a great job. Life is good.

3:24p.m. I want to buy books. I’ve been itching to buy the complete boxed set of the Dark Tower novels by Stephen King for only $122.99 I just started thinking about these books. Im trying to figure out how to spend that big fat stipend of $179 I’m supposed to get this month. I’ll put it all on Amazon gift cards and buy the books.

I’m a book addict and I desperately need a fix.But I will not be able to feed my habit. I seriously doubt I have that much money available. I don’t trust the business office because they lied before. Still, all that money will be dancing around in my head. I can’t shake it. I must have those damned books!

I won’t know for sure until September 18. This is.wben the nursing home is going Walmart shopping. In the meantime I’ll be driving myself crazy thinking about those damned books and worrying about money I won’t even get. I swear this describes insanity to T.

I’m trying to tell myself to STOP! I do not need those books I have plenty of books. I just bought four books by Henry Kissinger a couple days ago. I want to read those after finishing The Truths We Hold by Kamala Harris. But I won’t be able to concentrate because I need another damned fix. I’m a true book addict and that is no joke.

6:46p.m. Supper was good and I ate it all. Then I was on the phone for a long time with Chocolatechip I was helping her out with personnel problem. I mostly just listened. In the end I had to put in my two cents. She took my advice and I hope it works out for us her.

I hope I was of some help. I don’t mind at all when she asks for my help. It makes me feel needed. Also I forgot about my obsession with books. I can now concentrate on The Truths We Hold by Kamala Harris. I hope I can finish that book tonight.

Speaking of books I was looking at tablets . I saw a Printom 10 inch tablet for $69.99. I was thinking instead of.blowing that money on books in should invest in a backup tablet. I had this one for awhile. The battery seems to be losing its charge. Perhaps it’s.for a tablet. Of course it depends if I get the $179. I will believe it when I have it in my big fat hands.

8:28p.m. I can’t sleep for a number of reasons. First, OCD is way out of control. I keep thinking about that damned money. Will I actually get $179 next week? I won’t know until the 18th. But it is running around in my head. I cannot think of anything else except how to spend it. Should I buy books or invest in good reliable tablet? I wish I can forget about these thoughts. I cannot put them to rest.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder or OCD can be a very.serious illness. It can keep me from doing the simplist of chores. It can be so overwhelming at times. There have been days where I couldn’t get out of bed. Sometimes it’s one dominating thought. Then it seems I have a million racing thoughts that will not go away.