Younger Me

Colby 17,

You have gone and messed you life up. I am writing this to you almost 40 years in the future. I wish I could come there in person and sit and talk, but this will have to do.

First. You don’t need a girl to complete you. Take the lesson learned from Pam. Yeah it’s nice to touch a boob, but when that becomes the focus and you allow yourself to fall at her feet and give up your plans it’s going to start a boulder rolling down a hill that you can’t stop.

For God sake stay away from Vikki she is really going to ruin you. Stick to the plan Air Force with Sean. Not to say you won’t find some happiness with her, but the daughter you have deserves to have mature parents, because the both of you let that poor girl down. Vikki will make you doubt yourself and eventually add a seed that will grow into festering depression.

The life you live after her is hard and I can’t guess what it would be if you walked at the first signs of trouble. Maybe you joined the service as you wanted, learned the discipline you so needed.

But you would miss out on some special moments. Bring there for all your children’s births. Being to hold each one first, give them their first kiss. Not to say you won’t have kids, you will because like me you want a family of your own.

Take your first job seriously, save money, stay away from the fancy money pit car. It was awesome, but so expensive. Stop having your parents bail you out. You’ve come to rely on the too much and they hope for so much more than you gave.

Patty. There has to be away to still meet her, as much as she broke you. I don’t think I was ever as happy with someone as I was with her. If you do find her don’t get comfortable and complacent. You never stopped loving her and treating her like a queen, but you missed something and you lose her. This effects everything. How you raise your sons. How you live your life. How much you care for yourself.

Maybe I am scaring you and maybe you should be scared. Life is scary and for all the awesome things coming your way it’s all going to close in on you if you’re not on top of things. Take some risks, this is definitely something you gave up because of Vikki.

Finally, don’t rely on your friends and lovers to complete you. Complete yourself. You deserve what you want and don’t deserve a lot of what you’ll get.

Love you,

Colby 53