Popping Candy My Anxiety

It’s 11:07pm and Iam currently sitting in bed with a lavender heat pack wrapped around my neck, listening to Bilateral Stimulation music (soft BLS tones), with a true crime documentary eating popping candy.

Ive had 2 minor anxiety attacks today, in between my attacks I feel fantastic. calm and relaxed, just what I would call normal. I am certain its the pain from my Torricollis causing it, because I’ve had aches in my shoulder and neck to the point it felt as though I was getting a migraine and I hyper fixate on the little niggles.

I also ended up with my daughters 16 yr old friend come to spend a couple of nights at the last minute, because she ran away from her carers house after they had gotten into a big fight and her carer had told her not to go back there when she left.

I know there would be more to the story, and I know this girl has run away from them before for them calling her derogatory names. But that’s ok, I got her to let them know where she was, and she contacted her case worker. I have to trust she has been honest with me about having contacted them to let them know she is somewhere safe and will be at school tomorrow.

earlier today I had a nanna nap and has the weirdest dream, I was in the little railway cottage that I lived in for a year as a teenager with my cousins mother, it wasn’t the exact cottage but it had the feeling of it being the same one. inside a cupboard there was a big snake, I kept putting my hand near it like I wanted to touch it, but I never did. instead I watched it moving and noticed it wasn’t a little snake, watched the patterns in the scales as it coiled around in the cupboard. The snakes head wasn’t visible, but I just knew it was there somewhere hidden, so never put my hand inside.

The snake in my dream was similar colour and pattern to a children’s python or diamond python, and it was extremely wide. The cupboard it was in was an off white/cream coloured and I only opened 1 of the doors up and took something out before noticing the snake was there, and drew my hand back and watched it closely.There were other people in the dream, but cannot remember who they were, but I definitely knew the people with me. I am sure that I have had this same dream in the past. I don’t know what happened afterwards as I was woken up by kids coming home from school fighting with each other as they walked in the house.