Lenny

I met Lenny one time, but he has lived with me every day since.

Many years ago I was apart of a group of whole heatedly kind humans trying to make a difference that mattered to someone. We would spend our time collecting toiletries, food, books, clothes and taking them to the homelessness community downtown. There was a common area where you knew you’d always find a large group, where the people often changed. But a few streets over in a less known spot was a community of homeless people that rarely saw new faces. We knew them by name. We have deep relationships. I think about all of them often, since unfortunately losing contact.

One day, there was a new face. He was a medium sized man. Olive skin, extra tan, mostly bald. He looked to be somewhere in his 40’s. I grabbed a sandwich, walked up to him and introduced myself. He looked me dead in the eye and said, “I’ve done a lot.od really bad things to a lot of people. Women are the top of that list. You don’t want to talk to me.” I paused for a minute still holding out the sandwich. Not sure how to respond. But i felt he was asking for forgiveness and grace. So I asked, “are you going to to hurt me? Right now?” He also paused and simply said, “no.”

So I sat. And I ate with him.

After a few moments of silence I asked if he wanted to share his story or if he’d like to keep it to himself. Something told me he needed to tell someone. So he did. He told me about enlisting in the army at 18 years old, deploying for 2 tours, being drafted for snipper school. Where they broke him. He said his mind and soul hadn’t been the same since. He went AWOL and when found was discharged. But the damage was done. He was on drugs, couldn’t hold a job, so he joined a violent gang. He stole with violence, he raped more women than he cares to admit.

But one day he woke up. He couldn’t be that person anymore. He tried to leave the gang but they beat him. So instead he ran and went into hiding living as a homeless man on the streets. He said he felt that’s what he deserved for all his sins and he would gladly accept that fait then to continue hurting other people.

I never saw Lenny again. He was fine from that spot the next week. But he has lived with me every single day. I hope he found the redemption he was looking for. He did a lot of bad things, but he’s deserving of forgiveness and love.

I don’t know if his story was true or not, it could have all been fabricated. What I do know, is I met a man who was looking for that forgiveness and acceptance and the way his eyes pierced into my soul has lived with me every single day since.