The future of the world
I dearly hope these dating and meeting people apps are not the future of how humanity finds someone to mate. I fell for the lure and subscribed to one of them just so I could see who liked me. So not worth it. I am in the middle of something else and I get a nofification of a like so decide to at least bother looking at it since I bothered paying for it. The first thing I see is someone who… seemed real and like someone maybe I’d like to get to know if the pieces all fell into place. And they probably won’t fall into place since I am leaving the country like a refugee and I am so not in a place to connect to people without anxiety to begin with so imagine me trying to actually meet someone on one of these sites, OMG!
I guess I signed up because I was curious what it felt like to make that kind of profile again, and based on the distant possibility that I might find someone I like chatting with where there is no pressure to meet up in person any time soon and they just feel like casual connecting chats but imagine me finding that on this kind of app of all places!
Yet sometimes I think of these sites the way I remember them in the old days and the entire culture of the process of connecting to people online feels absolutely and completely different. I cannot imagine chatting with anyone and a connection forming like it sometimes did in the old days and I wonder how much of that is me and my attitude and how much of it that these sites are hopelessly depressing and leave some of us praying that there must be some other way than this. When you want to meet a partner in this culture and you ask others for advice where do they tell you to go? My guess is that dating sites are the only suggestion that most people would have to offer and if this is the way we are expected to find ‘intimacy’ with another person I am screwed and there has to be another way. So, I saw her name, and the first thing she wrote about was being really interested in self-care and from that alone I thought, wow, this person seems cool and maybe she’s someone I could talk to. I swiped left so I could see more pictures but whoops this is Tinder and instead of seeing more pictures I accidentally rejected her with a ‘nope’ and now have to pay Tinder even more money if I want to get her back (i.e. send her a message), which I probably wouldn’t have anyway, but if the rest if her profile was as good as that first word!!! LOL.
I feel really bad too because I didn’t mean to do it. I actually thought she was real yay but I barely started reading the profile and swipe now Tinder needs more money if I want to send her a message which is the feature I paid for already. She happens to be the only promising prospect of the bunch. I started worrying if maybe she would find out about the rejection and then realised, no, it just means that if I want to take this any further Tinder needs more of my money. LOL. Please let this not be the future of the world.