Updates
It surprises me how long I can go between writing. I haven’t gotten the other diary going yet, I look forward to that, so figured in the meantime I’d write an update here.
Lets see, the run down….
Spirit, my sweet and precious blind 2yo princess of a horse, became officially mine when I was finally able to adopt her from the program she was owned by, on September 11th. That day has a few different meanings to me, and with that the perfect day for such an occurance. She’s been under my care and training since she was 6mo. I have always loved her very very much. She has a very long life ahead of us, and I look forward to it. Hopefully this next year I’ll be able to take her to the coast and have pictures taken.
Gotta, my sons horse, was euthinized September 18th. It was a difficult day for us, as he watched a horse he received for Christmas put down. As a mother, this was the hardest thing for me to do. I was not just ending my horses life, which I’ve had to do before, but rather my sons horse who he loved very much. He saw how much pain she was in and agreed, but I was the one that had to make the call, to schedule the appt, and to hold her leadrope, and to hear my sons tears. I am grateful for the kindness of my vet, as well as the man who drove the truck that picked her body up. I hope to not face another day like that for a long time. She was a wonderful horse.
School is going well for the kids, my son especially. Last year was very difficult for him and he basically gave up, his grades slipping from 3/2, to 2/1, to all 1’s. This year he is rocking, although I am trailing that backside of his, and am in constant communication with the teacher. The two projects he’s turned in so far have been incredible and very well done. I’m a proud mama 🙂
Surrogacy – Cassidy is now 4 1/2mo!! Time is flying by, and the pictures I’m receiving are the dearest of dearests. Last week I finally received the picture I was hoping her mom would eventually send, a picture of the two of them together. I wanted to reach through the computer and hug her when I received it (she hates cameras, but took it just for me) – see, she has a blood disorder that leaves her chance of dying quite large. My mom asked me a question after Cassidy had left for home, the only time I cried about the situation, "What if she died tomorrow". I hope I never loose her, not until she’s an old lady, has seen Cassidy through high school, married, and children of her own. But if she did die tomorrow, she will have died with one of the most improtant dreams of hers granted. She is no longer longing, her heart is no longer aching. She holds her daughter in her arms, a piece of my heart. And Cassidy? She is the most beautiful little girl in the world 😀 I will be seeing her in November, and then going up for Christmas. I can’t wait!
….. and on the other side. We’re working on a sibling for Mimi. Mimi is my near 5yo surro-daughter. She recently came to understand that she grew in my tummy, it was adorable when she explained it. It’s neat to see how, through time, things are coming together. When explinations are given, when questions come up. Our first cycle failed, we are hoping the second one works. If not, we continue on each month and will turn to a clinic for help eventually. The cards are stacked against us this time, with a low count and motility, but we are trying anyway.
Money – I took a hard drop in income this last week, but it’s actually worked out well (after I finished gulping and worrying). Starbucks and Subway have been my most difficult enjoyments to cut out, but with the cut in income, I’m learning to make all meals from scratch and am having a lot of fun with it. I bought $100 worth of basics (canned, noodles, sauces, etc) from the $1 store and the rest of what I needed from the regular store. It’s been a week now and I think I’ve only spent around $40 at the regular store for things such as milk and vegetables. I did pick up powdered milk today, which many of the recipes seem to be calling for. Yesterday the kids were thrilled when I handmade (everything) tortorlinis. Tonight I made my first loaf of bread since I was a kid (the kids were so excited!), and for dessert tonight I made what is equivalent to Frosty’s from Wendy’s – the kids about died, raving reviews I received! I found the recipe to make ricotta cheese from scratch, so will be making that tomorrow – as well as raviolis. Giving my hand at making yogurt too. Basically it’s anything I can make that’s full of flavor, the kids love, that only involved the basics to cook. It’s pretty impressive how much of it all I have in my cupboards. What’s even more impressive, is how much money I’m saving (gobloads) and how thrilled the kids have been with their meals… and how nutritious they’ve been!
Divorce – Well, the girls dad finally called and asked to file… it’s well past time, but I’m glad we waited. It’s been near 2 1/2 years since we seperated, and really, how we wanted everything set up is quite different now then it was then. We’re also able to talk like normal human beings, discuss issues, questions, put together a realistic parenting plan without seething frustration from either of us. We’re able to express what eachother needs, as well as the kids, it’s nice. The original papers were filed Sept. 27th…. we’ll be sending the final papers in sometime around the 1st of the year. Although things have been ended now for quite a while, it’s strange as it’s officially ending. I’ve learned a tramendous amount over these last few years, as well as what I could have done in the marriage. I do have moments of sadness, which I didn’t expect. I think, hope, we’ll always be friends in some sort of capacity though. He’s a great guy.
Well, I think that’s just about it. A few other things, but it’s late. I’ll mention them later.