אני קושית יפה/I’m a Cute Black Girl Pg 78
Just as a very hot and windy weekend…. and I went to bed last night feeling all prepared for this very important and big weekend. 
But now it is raining… 
and I googled the weather for this week…
It should be warmish at 23 degrees Celsius, but it will also be overcast, and it is Cape Town so you can never be certain with the weather!
Oh well…there are worse things to worry about than just the weather! Like perfecting my Hebrew reading for the Shabbat service this Saturday. And making sure that the roadblocks for the Formula E, which is happening right where I live, will not hamper by driving to the shul. I think I have it all figured out, but still you have got to be prepared for everything so I will leave early to go to shul and just make sure that I have enough time to manage any traffic cops, who tend to direct traffic badly, and any traffic from others wanting to see the Formula E and of course it is the weekend so everyone tends to want to come to the Atlantic Seaboard.
I was planning on going to see my mom at the cemetery today, but since the Weather Gods have decided to let is shower down onto Cape Town today, I am going to have to go on another day this week.
The past few days I have been missing her so much. While going through everything that we have planned for out graduation brocha I have kept wanting to be angry that she got to be at my sisters’ bat mitzvahs, and even though this Saturday is not the same, it is the closest that I will have ever to having a bat mitzvah and she won’t be there. I look back to my wedding day and how I found some time to talk to her; I sat in the sun on the balcony of the hotel room I was getting ready in and told her how much wished she was there with me. She got to give my sisters away, on their wedding days, and how I wish she was there to give me way too. I did have my father there and he gave me away but still it would have been nice to have them both give me away.
I just remembered how I would like the rabbi to refer to me as Bat shal (Father and Mother’s name) as supposed to Bat shal Avraham Avinu.
Congratulations on your graduation :-). I am so sorry your mom won’t be there to share in your special day. I lost my mother when I was 14 and it makes me sad how much of my life she wasn’t here for. God did bless me with a stepmother that I love very much.
@happyathome 😘 Thank You!
I am glad that you love your step mom.
A year after my mother died my father introduced me to this women, who he is still with in fact he lives with her and neither my sisters or I like her. He has promised us that he will never get married again. And I swear if my father wasn’t living some sort of a good life with her and wasn’t happy with her, I would have had some serious foul words thrown in her face. Every time I see her, I have to suck in all my true thoughts and feelings and give her a hug and cheek to cheek kiss. It is so fuckin’ hard but know that that keeps my father happy in my life, it is all worth it.
@ncumisa Oh I do understand because for years I didn’t like my stepmother…there were some rough times. I have, thankfully, grown to love her. Partly, like you, I was willing to overlook some things because I knew my daddy was happy and I knew she was taking care of him.
😘 A few years ago my sisters and I had a talk about how if life went the other way around and our mother was still alive and out father wasn’t (touch wood that he lives for many more years), she would never have found someone else. Now we didn’t mean this in a bad way towards our father, just looked at how different a man and a woman can be.
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Mazel tov! 😊
Thank You, @collylovesjase 😘
@ncumisa No prob 💕
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