Pen pal

Valued correspondence with my pen pal:

My dearest confidant,

     As the evil ones get closer to leaving I find my self worried and stressed. I am almost in tears because of it. I have such a powerful desire to continue to be kind and patient and forgiving. It is something I want to maintain at all times. But these people. . . these harsh, trashy, foul, self absorbed, lying, leeching, loathsome, nasty, noxious, nauseating,  coarse, contemptible, corrupt little passive aggressive shits make me want to commit crimes. I can not honestly admit to feeling anything toward them but silent hatred. Even still as they continue to attempt to commit theft by stealthily packing away something that belongs to me I remain soft spoken and forgiving. "Oops! that one is mine sorry"  Each time they basically throw the item back at me and growl something that sounds like an apology but could never be construed as one. "No problem, easy mistake" I say. Now the time comes they are leaving tomorrow morning and going to a party tonight. The things of mine that she has squirreled away to her boyfriends house she promised to return by today (Thursday) As they are walking out the door heading for their party I say "Jacalyn, I know you are leaving in the morning, please don’t forget my things?" Imagine that being said quietly and with the smallest tremor as confronting people who piss me off makes me shake. "I don’t need to be reminded twice you fuckin bitch, you’ll get your goddamn shit! ok?" 
     Maybe I’m just being emotional because this JUST happened, or maybe it is completely legitimate. Either way, this is my confession:

                          The only reason that I have not slapped her in her over righteous face is because she is bigger than me and I know she would fight dirty.
I firmly believe that I am justified in my desire to deliver physical harm on the people who frequently call me "slut and whore" and who find no greater joy than spreading vicious rumors about me.
I have never once said a mean or hurtful thing to either Jacalyn or Jeremy. I am never anything but encouraging. Yes there are many terrible things I would like to say.
I confess: I do believe that she deserves her piece of shit, mooching boyfriend. I do believe that said piece of shit is correct in telling her that no one else will treat her better.
I confess: I do think that Jeremy is one of the stupidest and ugliest men to have ever darkened my doorway.
I confess: I do think that Jacalyn is a hypocritical idiot.
I confess: I feel terrible that her mother has breast cancer but do not feel that it, in any way, absolves jacalyn of her evilness.
I confess: I have spent long hours trying to figure out what I ever did to make them want to treat me this way when I am so generous and good to them.
I confess: I have let it bother me to tears.

I needed to tell someone. You seemed the natural choice.

Response from pen pal:

My Sweet Wonderful Treasure,
 
      You have suffered such horrific abuse, such violent emotional havoc, and such a betrayal of the social contract.  And your response is to hammer out a confession to me.  ALL of your feelings are justified, and your behavior beatifically restrained.  You were right to send me this.  It is hard for me to endure reading your pain at the hands of these subhuman squanderers of oxygen.  Their misbehavior is so breathtakingly small, mean, petty, and banal.  They actually SPEND the time they have left in this life TRYING to hurt other people, despite the fact that it does not benefit them in any way.
 
      I will not let hatred into the smallest molecule of myself.  Hatred condones evil, and is the antithesis of everything that I hold sacred.  As you can tell from the first paragraph, I am not so lucky with anger.  I am filled with alternating waves of rage and sadness.  I wish I could hold you while you struggle for some catharsis.  If it is any consolation, what they are doing is called projection.  They are projecting onto you everything they hate and loathe about themselves.  To keep from harming themselves they find someone they are profoundly jealous of and treat them the way they think they themselves deserve.
 
      You have turned the other cheek, you have met evil with kindness, you have not taken an eye for an eye.  You have personified the golden rule, despite the most egregious provocation I can imagine.  My respect for you has now reached the level of worship.  You have confessed to feelings you could not help, to thoughts you did not ask for.  You have been justified in both areas, yet you ACT on the impulse to confess, and listen to the better angels of your nature.  A brave new world that has such creatures in it.  As your intercessor I absolve you.  Te Maxima Absolvo.
 
      You will never regret letting go of them without letting them make you less than what you are.  You have friends and admirers who are intelligent, talented, spiritually strong, who hang on your words, and live in your smile.  Let their love be your strength, and your revenge be a life well lived, free of their memory.

He gives me too much credit I fear. Still, I like having something to live up to.

kiss the frog!