Starting to think

You know what, it has been me along.

• I was a shit husband, twice. I was more selfish then giving. I needlessly expected love and caring. I did all these things for them both and assumed they would appreciate me. I didn’t realize they wanted to be unappreciated like the men they left me for. Instead of sitting around being a “man” I did things and made choices for all of them and not myself.
• I chose to sometimes make sure the kids had clothes, food, and shelter instead of a car payment on time or such.
• I assumed my friends and siblings would somehow be there for me as I was for them, when bad things happened.
• I busted my ass for an employer who I thought would see and appreciate me for it. Pushing myself to a point where I physically unable to do some mundane jobs like stocking or standing for hours. Instead, I should have become more buddies with everyone so when it came time to lay someone off it wouldn’t have come down to who kisses ass best.
• I lived a life of loyalty and honesty and now I am reaping the rewards of poverty and loneliness everyone strives for.