Christmas 12/25/22

4:45a.m. So this is Christmas. My aide woke me u frfrom a very strange dream. I was a clerk in a retail store. I think I was working for Dollar General. There was a lot of fighting between employee and we were losing customers? I was saying to other workers that this fighting must stop and we must work as a team. The store is operating at a loss I said. If this keeps up management will shut it down.

Then the aide woke me up. She did a good job. I got washed up and a shave then she changed my briefs. I was able to sit on the sside of the bed without help. She put a clean gown on me and I was able to get in my wheelchair without nightmares help. I wished her a Merry Christmas and compliment her on her work.

My only complaint is she got me up way too early. I was in my wheelchair by 4:30. I wasn’t ready to get out of bed. This means I will have to wait for over two hrs for morning coffee.  This is the only part that sucks.

So this is Christmas. I had a nice Christmas after all th anks to the nursing home. My favorite was a $25 gift card from Amazon. But I appreciated everything. I really wasn’t expecting anything. Those gifts really meant a lot to me.

Then I felt bad about Chocolatechip She had a run in with another tenant. This really upset her. She said it ruined her Christmas. I don’t want to go into detail but Chocolatechip was very upset. This made me upset But we recovered. She felt a little better when she helped a woman with dementia pass out Christmas cards.

I think I’m coming down with a cold. I’ve been waking up doing a lot of coughing and sneezing. I also have a terrific headache. I feel like shit today. They insist on turning on the a/c despite the fact it is so cold. Here I am wearing a skimpy hospital gown freezing my butt off. No wonder I get sick.

But I am not going to let this ruin my day. .I’m going to enjoy Christmas. I will think of my parents and all the good times we had on Christmas. Those were indeed happy times that will never be forgotten.

1:11p.m. I was sleeping almost all mornning.  They say rest is good for a cold so that is what I’ve been doing. I had some strange dreams while asleep. I remember this one dream where I was in a car with my parents. My dad was driving. He hit a store. Instead of getting out and checking for damages he tried to drive the car up the wall. It was tipping over and about to crash when I woke up.

I’ve been tired and listless all morning dozing on and off. I got a bit depressed thinking about Chocolatechip. We sure did have a lot of good timesj during the Christmas time. She is a wonderful baker and would be always bake a huge plate of cookies every year. Then she would cook a wonderful Christmas dinner. I got fat from her cooking.

I got to thinking if we will ever see each other again. I’m in this nursing home in Follansbee. Chocolatechip is in Weirton. We are not that far apart but she doesn’t drive. We might as well be on opposite sides of the country. She was supposed to come and see me this year but plans sort of backfired. Got very depressed over that one. I was looking forward to a visit.

Then it is par for the course. I’ve been in this nursing home going on three years. I had not one visitor. I have family living in the same town. There must be some kind of bad feelings because they don’t call much less visit. I try not to dwell on this because thinking about it soon puts me in a very bad place.  But it is very, very hard during Christmas time.

Like I said I’m not going to dwell. I feel pretty spry and alert thanks to a good lunch. I had two ham slices, mashed potatoes with gravy, mixed veggies and a slice of apple pie. I also had two cups of coffee? ?unch cheered me up a bit.

Now that I’m awake I want to try and read the New York Times this afternoon. I haven’t read in a few days. I guess depression and being physically sick with a cold got the best of me. But I feel good right now and want to catch up on my reading.