Uncertain Times

I don’t feel like I have a purpose right now.. And I’ve been feeling this way for a long time.

I feel like my body has betrayed me. It gives out on me without warning. I’m unable to work I’m on disability now. And without work what are we?

So that’s part of it and I think the other part is just America is so crazy right now and I don’t think it’s just this country I think the whole world is crazy.

So all of this is true, and this is also true: I am blessed.  I have a stable relationship with a man that loves me very much and makes enough money for all of us to live. I have fresh running water just at the turn of a tap. I have more than enough food to eat.

So why aren’t I happy? Well the constant pain has a lot to do with it. And really thats it. Because at this age I feel like things are easier. I’m more tolerant than I used to be. I’m not striving constantly. I’m just whatever mon’.