Day 5 early Edition
Breakfast ready captain crunch worked yesterday, so captain crunch it was. No comments on breakfast. So, I take it as a win.
Chance: Bus, are you taking me?
Me: I wasn’t going to town, but I guess I can
Chance: no, just asking doesn’t make it into anything
Me: remember the city tomorrow, so don’t make plans
Chance: I was going to see if a friend could come over, and we could ride Buck and old paint.
Me: you need clothes and shoes
Chance: you can look at the size and get that size on amazon mom did, then just don’t wash them in hot water because everything fit before that.
Me: that’s fine for clothes, but you need to try on shoes.
Chance: I don’t need new shoes
Me: you’re standing there missing one. You need new ones 
Chance: (in a tone I haven’t heard before) you don’t understand anything, it’s fine please can I have company Saturday, please
Me: we need to go to the city.
Chance: won’t wear them. Bus is here got to go love me
Out the door, he goes. Wish he would talk to me.
When a parent leaves, kids feel fear of losing everyone, sadness, and anger. The most important thing you can do is let him know that none of is thoughts, words, or actions caused his mom to leave and that he is loved and cherished.
You can say things like, “I can’t understand how you feel, but I see that you are sad sometimes and angry at other times. I’m always here to talk, no matter how you are feeling.”
As for the shoe, ignore it. The other one is probably at school waiting for him. Contact his teacher to let them know what’s going on at home. Maybe his mindset is, “one parent, one shoe,” you just can’t know for sure.
One thing that might help at home is if you two tackle learning household chores together. He might resist at first, but asking him to help figure out how do things his mom did will give him insight to how hard you’re trying. It will also help build a new family structure for both of you. I’d start with laundry! Then maybe simple meals, like eggs or grilled cheese.
@cozzet I think he does think he did something. I have given him a few things to do to help. The Laundry thing has been a mess I have messed up most of the clothes. The school knows his teacher says he is trying to find himself not sure what that means. I do know the first day when this mess started, Chance couldn’t find his shoe which is pretty normal for him I said, just wear your boots He said mom had one in her truck I ask him why He said mom didn’t care, and walked off. After he calmed down. The best I can figure is they had been somewhere, and on the way home, he fell asleep and kicked it off, are she was taking them off of him and didn’t finish. The next morning she was gone. So maybe what you said makes sense. Thank you
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