Like a grown woman

There’s so much to update but I only have time for a few words

Eric told me last night that he really liked how I handled myself throughout all of this. He said “like a grown woman.” He elaborated that I said exactly what I wanted, I explained what I felt, I put up my boundaries and what I would accept and what I wouldn’t. And I never wavered. He respected a lot that I didn’t say “I can’t do this like this” and then when it got hard wavered and changed my mind.

I am really fucking proud of myself too. It was what I needed for myself. And it felt good to stick to my morals and protect myself, even when it hurt and when it was hard. Especially so.

I will admit I had times when I wondered if I was doing the right thing. Both questioning what I was doing and also wondering, that while I never have Eric an ultimatum or presented it as such, wondering if my motivation wasn’t actually a secret ploy to get him to choose.

In the end I said what I wanted. Had enough self respect to stick to it. And that was attractive to him. I think I like that even more.