Successful week

I’m on flight to Miami for a 36 hour trip to see a patriots game. It’s been a great couple of days in AZ. The 5 days before with Eric in FL was pretty incredible too!

so much to update…but just wanted to get a few highlights out while I had time. I’m updating from my phone so it’ll be more brief.

Eric impressed my parents. They ADORE him!

i didn’t have a lot of time with my parents without him around, but in the 2 mins I did have they told me they liked him and were very impressed by his kindness and how sociable and outgoing he was. I told him that a friend had just described him as Matt’s literal antithesis. They laughed and said they never knew matt that well but could see that. I joked that I told them I was going to upgrade the next time. My mom said that my dad had just commented about that, he’d wished I’d done it a long time ago…like maybe the first time I’d met Eric lol. I said that sometimes things need time to mature and weren’t right at the time. They understood that. My dad said “ryanne, I don’t think there is anyone better.” That was high praise!

Eric had some down time while I worked a half day Tuesday. He asked my mom if she’d want to go antiquing. I think my jaw dropped and I teared up a bit. She got super excited. As did my dad. They all had a lovely time Tuesday antiquing. Eric found this fabulous large gold plate for his ottoman. And several new vinyls. My mom found a ring. They all came back with great stories.

my dad shipped Eric’s plate to him yesterday as it was too large for the plane ride home. My dad sent Eric a text message after he sent it. Eric read it to me last night. I may not have it exact but from memory, it said “Eric it was an absolute pleasure meeting you. Denise and I were blown away by your kindness, politeness, and how you carried yourself. You are welcome in our home anytime.” I feel like there was more said, but that was the gist. Very high praise from my dad. I doubt my dad ever said anything close to that to matt. And I know he meant what he said. He really was blown away. Not easily accomplished. My dad isn’t a tough critic, but not that easily blown away either.

eric told me that he and my dad had sat down for an hour or so Wednesday when I was working and had a really deep and intimate conversation about children, relationships with kids and parents, regrets from divorce, my relationship with my mom, Eric’s with his kids, etc. WOW 🤩 They got deep.

Eric told me that being like my dad is his retirement goal. He wants to be comfortable and kind like my dad. I’ve never sought out my dad. But if I’m being honest, I value the important parts of my dad. His work ethic, responsibility, and definitely his kindness. It’s probably no wonder I’m attracted to Eric for those things and why my dad is so impressed by those things in Eric too. My dad volunteers in retirement with kids in school and Eric wants to do something similar. He said he wanted to do some of those things when he was a SRO, and he’d love to do what my dad does when he retires. The mutual admiration and respect between them is everything I’ve wanted.

i still can’t help but feel like things are less than solid and secure. There is nothing that says “insecure” in all of it, but I’m still struggling a bit to feel comfortable and stable in the future. I need to figure out what that’s about.

eric heard from my friends that there is a cruise in April and he wants to go on it together.

he also asked me about Christmas. He’d like to exchange small gifts but plan a vacation together.

i feel like he’s focused on the future and that should be giving me some sense of security. It does. But I’m still maybe missing a key ingredient.

perhaps it’s the time apart. We just start to get a sense of rhythm, we are apart again. I’m hoping that this next trip, which has us together for 18 days, helps. The first half is him on vacation, as we’ll be in CA, so it’s not real life. But, I’m hoping the length of time and the last half being real real life with us both working, will be a better reality.